Post your thoughts on Johnson's Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man.
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In chapter VII on page 64 the narrator said "I often heard the younger and brighter men discussing the time they would compel the public to recognize that they could do something more than grin and cut pigeon wings." I think that the narrator himself isn't really trying to show the public that black men can do more than "grin and cut pigeon wings." With getting caught up in gambling and giving up cigar making for a living he has basically given into the stereotype that black men are lazy and can't commit to doing any one thing. The fact that he left college and passed on working hard and actually getting an education to move to New York to live his life gambling shows that he can't commit. Playing the piano is the only thing for himself at the moment that he can fall back on. At the end of chapter VIII the narrator accepts a man's invitation to travel to Europe with him an play the piano. This decision may not have been the best choice for the narrator to make. He really knows nothing about this man he has no clue how traveling to Europe will change his future. I personally think that this choice will end up hurting him in the long run and that he should have done the safe thing and stayed at Atlanta University, worked hard and continues his education. I think that his lack of commitment and spur of the moment actions foreshadows that Europe won't be a good experience for him
In this chapter, our narrator begins playing music for a wealthy acquaintance as entertainment to his guests. He begins to create a relationship with this aristocrat, and further than an employer relationship, they become friends. Interestingly enough, the ex-colored man never feels patronized or de-humanized, even though he is treated as mere entertainment. In fact, he is honored: “It was a pleasure to me to watch the expression of astonishment and delight that grew on the faces of everybody.” (72) The aristocrat, although he clearly thinks of him as talented, treats him almost as an object, by “loaning” (73) him to friends and resting while he played. Our narrator is actually very appreciative and honored; he refers to the aristocrat as “my good patron.” (73) This scenario truly shows the narrator’s good spirit, humility, and positive attitude, and when the guests stopped paying attention to him, he was not “disconcerted” (71). Similarly, later on in the chapter, the narrator gets used once again and comes to the conclusion that he was being used by the woman “to excite the jealousy of her companion and revenge herself upon him.” (74)
Music is a prominent recurring theme in the novel. Ever since he was a boy, the main character, who I'll call character X, has been influenced by varying musical styles in his younger years. It may not seem to affect him yet, but it does play some subliminal role in the shaping of his character and the character of the novel. At the start of the novel he learns to play the piano and is influenced by the classical music that his mother plays. This marks the assimilated period of his life; he is still accepted into the white group in his school and conforms to the norms of the society. Classical music represents the traditional European values that once governed America. Before African American and other cultures emerged within the US, there was standard adherence to the ways of Western Europe. Their music was adopted as well as the social standards of slavery and class. This classical music that he plays sets the tone for the first few pages of the novel. Character X then discovers his "flaw" on page 11. He is black and changes his entire demeanor because of it. However, once he moves to New York, he discovers the new and exciting genre of music called ragtime (61). It is with this new form that X unearths the rich potential and meaning that is inherent in the African American race. He begins to embrace this form of music and therefore also his culture. Ragtime music represents all of the diversity and greatness that black Americans possess, and the equality that they deserve. It is foreshadowing of the rest of the novel, and of the future of African American culture. Ragtime may have not been taken seriously at first in American culture, but some people could not hold back their preference for it. Johnson says, "These are lower forms of art, but they give evidence of a power that will some day be applied to the higher forms," (54). Blacks deserve their equality and this is shown by the theme of music in An Ex-Colored Man. It is a deep and influential idea in the first chapters of the novel. It shapes the life of X as he is torn between the white and black races, and makes the novel a metaphor for the whole of American culture.
"...but the woman was so beautiful that my native gallantry and delicacy would not allow me to repulse here" (74).
This book hates on women. They are seen as beautiful, dangerous objects. His own mama just cleans and plays piano. The violin girl is the object of the narrator's desire. And the Widow is just that -- a Widow whose outlived her first husband and spends time weaving dangerous webs that ends in her own destruction. There's not one true woman in this novel.
Even the City in this novel becomes a product of the male fantasy: "She sits like a great witch at the gate of the country, showing her alluring white face, and hiding her crooked hands and feet under the folds of her wide garments,--constantly enticing thousands from far within, and tempting those who come from across the seas to go no farther" (55).
"Alluring white face" contrasting with "crooked hands and feet," elements of beauty juxtaposed against elements of disgust, repulsion. Yet our narrator continues to look on, for it's a beautiful and ugly world where he lives, and where we travel. After the death of the Widow, he writes, "but still I could see that beautiful white throat with the ugly wound. The jet of blood pulsing from it had placed an indelible red stain on my memory" (75).
Music has always proven to be a sanctuary. even for myself, i look forward to my band class every day that i have it because its a nice time to relax, do something you enjoy and make good sounds. for johnson, music is the same. playing the piano was something he could always turn to and it would always be there no matter what else was happening in his life. music is something that most people can relate to in some way or another and that is why it is such a universally loved thing. without music life would be incredibly different. there would be no music on the radio, just talk shows and other things that not as many people listen to. many cultures use music as more than just something to enjoy, it can be part of sacred rituals and other ceremonies. music is an incredible thing and for johnson, it is something he can always look to in times of trouble.
When it seems that the boy's life begins to be falling apart with gambling taking up his time and forces him to quit his job, he starts taking up ragtime music. He quickly learns how to play it and soon masters it. Again music plays a large role in the young man's life because it saves him from the trouble gambling was causing him and he can still turn his life around. He quickly gains the respect of people at "The Club" and they see him as a great musician with an amazing amount of talent. He became so good that he, "developed into a remarkable player of ragtime; indeed, I had the name at the time of being the best ragtime player in New York" (Johnson 70). The young man took what he knew combined with what he learned to make a new type of ragtime that everyone loved. He saved his life while making new friends who appreciated him for who he was and what he could accomplish. One particular friend went as far as inviting the young man to his home to personally listen to the new type of ragtime. The boy was paid well and was making an honest living that was well respected. The young man is no longer the self-conscious boy who worried about his skin color; he is a man on his way to success leaving behind the troubles of his childhood. Music lets him get away from the problems of race and color and his friends and listeners only see him as a musician who has mastered an American genre of music.
The male mentality. Is it more manly to attack the other male in a situation where your female associate is unfaithful? Or, would it be right to go after the female with the thought that if you were in the other mans shoes, you would take advantage also? (male mentality) Although "he" could have been wrong, although "his" eyes could have deceived him, the "male mentality" would have taken over in any situation and gone with one of the solutions above. There is no possible way a "true man" could have been a "tweener" in this situation. For one, his reputation as a man could be tarnished even though he could have been wrong in the first place. In this situation, even the other man (X) had no doubt that he would be the one receiving the blow. "My feelings were far from being comfortable; I expected every moment to feel a blow on my head. She, too, was very nervous; she was trying hard to appear unconcerned, but could not succeed in hiding her real feelings." (page.74)
Now, since I cannot write anymore on that topic, and I don't have 250 words yet, I'm going to talk to you about how nasty the New York Giants are. A 41-13 victory yesterday pretty much convinced me that they will indeed win the Superbowl again.
Moving forward, chapters 6, 7 and 8 bring the protagonist to New York City. He is exposed to gambling, and all the negative things that go on in the city. Quitting his job as a cigar roller, the ex-colored man devotes his days to gambling, specifically craps. He also begins to hang out in the ”Club” where he plays the piano. He gets many piano plays gigs from a millionaire friend but still has time for gambling. One particular night at the “Club”, the main character sits with the “widow” and begins to drink champagne and talk with her. As he can see in her eyes, the “widows” escort is pacing behind him and the protagonist says, “I expected every moment to feel a blow on my head.” I would be thinking the same thing at this point since he is drinking with a woman who is “with” another man. On the contrary, her companion comes over to the table, pulls out a revolver and shoots her in the throat. The main character is shocked and flees the scene immediately. His instinctive decision to flee was probably, in this particular instance, the best choice to make. If he were to stay, then he runs the risk of being shot by the ”widow’s” former companion who, just moments earlier had shot her.
In Chapter 7 of The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, the narrator meets a rich woman who he terms the "widow", and her black companion. He describes her as "always dressed elegantly", and him too as faultlessly dressed, wearing clothes by one of the most exclusive tailors in New York. The narrator also learns that the "widow" paid for this man's clothes and diamonds. He further comments, "I shall never forget how hard it was for me to get over my feelings of surprise, perhaps more than surprise, at seeing her with her black companion; somehow I never actually enjoyed the sight." In the next chapter of the novel, this "widow" motions the narrator over to come and sit with her. He knows that this is a dangerous this to do, and says, "I went, knowing that I was committing worse than folly." As the scene progresses, the narrator senses that the situation is becoming worse. When the “widow’s” expression becomes frightened, he notices that her companion has entered the room with an “ugly look”. This man comes towards the “widow”, takes out a gun, and fires a shot into her throat. In interpreting this scene and what happened in it, it is obvious that the reason for the black man’s anger was the behavior of the “widow”. What the most confusing and surprising thing was, was the black man’s decision to shoot the widow instead of the narrator, the man who she was flirting with. Male behavior would incline men to deal with other men, rather than the women. This is most likely due to the pride of men and their tendency to want to have their companions all to themselves. Here, this is clearly not the case. Another interesting part of chapter 8 shows that the black man’s intentions could have been to also kill the narrator. On page 75, the narrator says, “There were other shots fired, but how many I do not know; for the first knowledge I had of my surroundings and actions was that I was rushing through the chop-suey restaurant into the street.” It is possible that after the black man killed the widow, he was trying to kill the narrator too.
The whole concept of the Chinese "Club" in Chapters 6 and 7 is central to the overall theme of the time period and the book. When the narrator arrives in New York City, he is amazed by the horror and awe with which it meets him. He describes "the dread power of the city" and now its inhabitants "cannot exist outside of it." I think that that is in many ways true of city-dwellers, in that everything outside of New York is blurry, quiet, and un-intriguing. The Club represents the same sort of environment. Primarily, there is diversity at the Club that the narrator has never before seen. Chinese people run the place, black and white people from all "walks of life" enjoy the entertainment and festivities that are there, and there is a black pride in the autographed pictures on the wall. In the Club is music, dancing, singing, laughter, play, and lots of drinking. When its patrons stumble out of its door in the early hours of the morning, the rest of the world seemed less exciting and real. I think that the widow is one of the most interesting characters that have appeared so far in this fictional piece. She, like the rest of the characters, does not have a name. However, the narrator holds such a fascination with her that he describes her to great detail, more so than any of the other characters that have entered his life. Her semi-openness with which she conducts her inter-racial relationships is very uncommon for the time period and makes her a fascinating character.
Great comments Libby. I'm wondering how the City fosters a sense of openness that's perhaps unseen in other parts of American life (pre-Civil Rights). Might not be a bad idea for someone to investigate the Cotton Club in Harlem, one of the most famous clubs in all of the Harlem Renaissance.
At the end of chapter V i found it interesting that the main character chooses to go to New York instead of back to his own town or out west. New York is known to be a cultural melting pot and for someone that is so ignorant and mentally stuck in a box, i found this to be an rather paradoxical destination. In chapter VI he reaches New York and him and his companions decide to go to a pool hall. Here there are multiple forms of gambling including a game called craps. It's a simple game and the main character learns how to play easily. He then decides to bet 20 dollars and proceeds to win almost 200 dollars. I found this to be a turning point in the characters life. Earlier in the reading the main character is less accepting of his black culture and speaks badly upon it. Now he's embracing the loud and rambunctious behavior happening in the pool hall. He seems to be accepting his black culture more and more as the book goes on. "This was gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself and I felt that it was worth the money even if I lost" (pg.58). Along with associating himself with his black culture, he now also wants acceptance from the black race. This is another turning point in the main character's life.
"Then he began to play and such playing! I stopped talking to listen. It was music of a kind I had never heard before. It was music that demandedphysical response, patting of the feet, drumming of the fingers, or nodding of the head in time with the beat. The barbaric harmonies, the audacious resolutions often consisting of an abrupt jump... but in which the beat was never lost." (60) This quote is very representative of the growth of the main character. What stroke me the most was the fact that he described the harmonies as barbaric. As if, at first he believed that musicians could only truly be great musicians if they were trained and cultured. He regarded the music as brilliant, but not the same brilliance that he might have classified himself under but a kind of lower class brilliance although he really enjoyed the music. He even seemed surprised that the notes were never lost and and that the chromatics were so clean cut. His introduction to ragtime seemed to also open his mindset to the brilliance of the "colored man" and his ability to play music regardless of the person not knowing" music theory anymore than the theory of the universe." As he continued to learn more about ragtime and the musicians that played it, his respect for them grew with the thought that maybe if the musician at the club had been trained "he might have become at best a mediocre imitator of the great masters in what they have already done to a finish or one of the modern innovators who strive after originality by seeing how cleverly they can dodge about through the rules of harmony, and at the same time avoid melody. It is certain that he would not have been so delightful as he was in ragtime." (62) Lastly, besides the fact that through ragtime he was able to grow and develop professionally by mastering ragtime it also helped him to diminish some pride. Because, although he had always prided himself in having such a musical ear and wonderful training, he was not able to just jump on the piano and play without fault. He had to practice and watch and in the end his practice brought him to the next stage of his life, a private musician paid generously, a pimp and a traveler.
"These people live in a little world of their own; in fact, I concluded that if a colored man wanted to separate himself from his white neighbors he had but to acquire some money, education and culture, and to live in accordance" (49).
The narrator has a clear perception of races within society and their roles because of his background and his childhood experiences. Before and after his realization of his ethnicity as a bi-racial man are clear differences in his mannerisms and views. He has a clear perception of what a white man is supposed to be and do in society along with that of a black man. However, after coming to terms with his heritage, he has having trouble coming to terms with his "role" in society and becomes a bit lost and confused, which is evident in his constant transition between lifestyles and jobs. His trouble with finding and discovering his identity ends up making him seem detached. Ever since his youth he has continued to move around from place to place and connecting with many different people, but only on the surface. He seems to have a fear of connecting with people or places beyond a certain limit, therefore keeps up his guard, just like with “red head”, the Mexicans in the cigar factory and black people. His perception of stereotypes and society seems to hinder him from making and real sort of connection with anyone or anything that he views as possibly crossing lines and stereotypes.
In Chapter VI, the narrator arrives in the diverse and tumultuous town of New York City. After boarding up in his new "home", he and a few others from the boarding house go to a "Gentlemen's Club". Or is it really a gentlemen's club? While there are those in the club who sit calmly playing poker on the second floor, the first floor is filled with loud men full of excitement. Some are playing/overlooking a game of pool, unconsciously overusing the "n word". As the narrator travels to the second floor, he views two rooms with men who's actions oppose the others. In the first room, he witnesses men quietly playing poker, often using the word "gentleman". The narrator then walks to the last gambling room. In this room, he found a number of men gathered around a pool table yelling at each other and at the inanimate objects that were being used in the game (dice). After getting into the action of the game and participating in the betting, the narrator quickly learns to like the game "craps".
This section of Chapter VI brings out a few negative characteristics in the narrator. For instance, the narrator, in a sense, loses control of his actions after experiencing a night in both the gambling club and "The Club". He is unable to stop betting when he is playing in the game of craps because he is too immersed in the excitement. At "The Club" he is taken back by the new music he hears, ragtime, and completely falls in love with both the new style of music he hears, as well as the all around affect of "The Club", including the drinks, the dancing, and the variety of people who enter the club. As a result, it is evident that the narrator is easily effected by the environment around him. We are unable to truly get a grasp at who he really is inside, or the kind of individual he is.
I thought some major themes in these chapters were gambling and moving up in life. It seems as if the narrator is consumed with money and status. As we have already seen he has been able to in a way "bypass" the different races. As he is educated and his skin color can pass as being black or white, he is able to move through different groups including black people and Spanish people. He builds relationships and is able to conform to each environment he enters. When he first encountered the game of craps he was enthralled, "but here was something new (57)." Like the piano, like the black race, like the Spanish language, these new things he had been able in a way to conquer and this was something he could also exhaust. The narrator also shows another side of him, one that loves attention when he gets the reaction, "Who is he?...This was a gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself, and I felt that it was worth the money even if I lost" (58). It seems like the narrator's relative disconnectedness with the other groups of people gives him a sense of privilege, which he embraces. When he treated everyone in the room to drinks I felt as if he was trying to draw more attention to himself and make himself feel better than others around him. He says, “I learned to fake a knowledge for the benefit of those who were greener than I” (65) showing how chameleon-like he is trying to be. He is drawn to lavish things and upon learning of a relationship between a rich white woman and a black man, he becomes consumed, and seems to idolize their dynamic.
Our extremely resilient protagonist, finds himself in a number of both difficult and unfamiliar situations. Whether it be the gargantuan effect of the untimely death of his mother, or the lesser significance of having his money stolen, he is only distracted momentarily and then continues to take setbacks in stride. His ability to "bounce right back up" seems to stem from his lack of connection to his peers after his mother dies. An example of this is the fact that throughout the story, we never find out the names of any of the characters. He is only concerned with how he can further advance his situation, and doesn't take the time to create lasting relationships. This can be seen in either a positive or negative way. Since he isn't held down by "trivial" things as emotion, friendship, and trust, he can pursue his dreams without deterrent. But on the other-hand, the following qualities aren't so unimportant when one is down and out, and he might eventually find himself a very lonely person.
Another component of his resilient nature are his amorphous qualities. Being bi-racial, and somewhat accepted by both races gives him an unmeasurable advantage. But his selfish nature doesn't allow him to act as a mediator between the two extremes.
Within the novel "The Autobiography of An Ex Colored Man" the critical narrator forces readers to question "what are the rules of harmony" mentioned in pg 62. Defined as a pleasing combination of musical chords", or "a pleasing effect produced by an arrangement of things parts or colors". In my perspective it seems as if the narrator is consistently searching & testing the boundaries of these rules of harmony. As he consistently migrates to different areas that bring new relationships, new pleasures, and ultimately new chords of music as to which the narrator assembles the bars- musical/ racial/ and stereotypical that plague his existential existence. Closed within a virtual box of self- arrogance & anti-socialism as a child, the bi- racial narrator, thrusts himself head first into a world in which physical connections are survival mechanisms for the future. The narrator's rules of harmony are thus simple- "Make temporary connections for myself without names, without social links, and without a family atmosphere". This greediness on the part of the narrator in my mind will not suffice as he continues to travel around the world into segregated, isolated, and even manipulated areas of inhabitation.
The main character of "The Autobiography of a Colored Man" is incapable of developing close relationships, which is perhaps the reason he has not expressed legitimate happiness throughout the book. Initially, he befriends two children at his school, whom he refers to as "Red" and "Shiny." Besides his mother, these are the only two semi-close relationships Johnson develops. Yet after Johnson graduates, mention of Red and Shiny ceases, suggesting that their friendship was never very strong. Even after his mother dies, Johnson describes his emotions in one sentence as, "a feeling of unutterable loneliness" (31). There has yet to be another reference to his mother, thus far in the reading. Otherwise, names are non-existent in this novel. He refers to other acquaintances as "the colored man," (42) or "my new found friend" (37). Yet his relationships are not signficant enough to require names. Johnson is an extremely selfish individual. He is too involved with himself and his "tragedies" to concern himself with others. After his mother's death, he does not mention himself crying out of grief. He does refer to "emotions swell[ing] in [his] heart" (32), however, because "several hundreds of people...were there solely on account of love or sympathy for [him]" (32). Therefore, Johnson finds the presence of his friends more touching than the actual death of his mother. His lack of attachments extends beyond people to places as well. He does not consider any location home, as he leaves cities without hesitation. He is without connection to both people and places and as a result, has not expressed happiness throughout the story. The closest he comes to contentment is when he refers to his duet with an attractive girl as a "positive dislike." He has a crush on his duet partner, but "constantly force[s] [his] accelerandos and rubatos upon the soloist" (18), revealing once again his egotism. The title of the book, “An Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man,” suggests that he does not even feel loyalty to his race, as he refers to himself as an “ex-colored man.”
The narrator says on page 58, "I could feel that I had gained the attention and respect of everybody in the room, every eye was fixed on me, and the widespread question, "Who is he?" went around. This was gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself, and I felt that it was worth the money even if I lost." This is a bittersweet statement made by the narrator. It is negative in the sense that for him, as a colored man, to get any sort of recognition by the people who surround him, he has to do something very exciting and stand out over everyone; in this case winning multiple times in a row while gambling. But, the narrator also feels as if this recognition is worthwhile however it may come. It was such a positive feeling for him to receive this recognition that this experience would still be worth it to him even if he lost all the money he had won from previous rolls. Later on he talks about this "Club" that he went to and closely observes the different types of people he sees spread throughout it. For example, he talks about this group of white variety performers he sees, and notes that he feels as if they come to the club to see Negro entertainers firsthand so they can "improve" the imitations they portray of them in their acts.
"...men who had lost all the money and jewelry they possessed, frequently, in an effort to recoup their losses, would gamble away all their outer clothing and even their shoes..." (59)
Grown men choose to disgrace themselves in the name of gambling...why? For fun? For winning? For risk? It doesn't matter, but it displays the sad state of NY. NY gives a chance of great opportunity and great fortune...but for the citizens of NY they choose to waste that opportunity and end up creating a society that flourishes around gambling, "diamond rings, scarf-pins, ear-rings..."(60) And a society that turns new fresh faces who bring promise (the narrator) into the same old materialistic and self-degrading individuals... I guess all do become victims to the alluring witch...
"...and all these become the victims of her caprice....riding high on the bubbles of fortune; then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall." (55)
After speaking about the events that took place the night James went to the club, James decides to go further into detail about the club. This night as a whole represents his love for New York City; the club represents a place where he can escape the racism he occasionally faces or witnesses during the day. His skill in gambling allows him to transcend the daily problems he faces. As the chapter progresses, we begin to notice James' consistent commentary on the characteristics of those around him. He appears insecure at times, often commenting on the overly affluent nature of the white people. James seems somewhat degrading, however, at the same time, envious of these people. That scene exhibits James' true personality, one marked by a desire for wealth and success. Towards the end of chapter VI, James become enthralled in the piano playing of a man in the club. He has to be dragged away by his friends just to leave. Throughout the novel, music has played a large part in James' life. It has acted as an escape for him. He is able to transcend his daily life into a state of euphoria when under the influence of the music of a piano. James' pure love for this instrument opposes his seemingly shallow personality, and in turn, portrays his character as sensitive.
Throughout the first 8 chapters, it becomes more and more apparent that our narrator is struggling to find an identity that he can truly hold on to. when he first travels to Atlanta to attend Atlanta University after his mother dies, his first reaction is that he does not belong with the African American class in the south, but also recognizes that he is not fully White. "Most of these celebrities I had never heard of. This made me an object of pity among many of my new associates. I, however, soon learned to fake a knowledge for the benefit of those who were greener than I; and, finally, I became personally acquainted with the majority of the famous personages who came to the "Club"" p. 65. Our narrator is, in a way, a fly on the wall within the culture of rich white people. he is a gifted piano player, and this fact gains him some recognition, but he is widely left with a surreal identity. In this context the narrator is a chameleon, as he is always attempted to blend into whatever background that he comes across.
“...a book that gave me my first perspective of the life I was entering; that book was ‘Uncle Tom’s Cabin’” (26) … “…it opened my eyes as to who and what I was and what my country considered me; in fact it gave me my bearing” (27). This quote is an important part of the narrator’s realization or solution to his identity crisis. At this point in the book he is beginning to realize what it means to be African American and also how others view him. The narrator realizes that his life growing up in Connecticut has been relatively sheltered compared to how African Americans in other parts of the country grow up. He begins to understand that while me may think that he was treated unfairly at school in Connecticut, other places treat African Americans much more harshly. The narrator begins to prepare himself for a different type of life in which he will be judged, criticized, and marginalized to a further extent. This awareness however gives him his “bearing”, meaning that his new outlook on life and demeanor in general will become much more steadfast and resolute. Because he knows what life is really like outside of the Northeast, he is better prepared to deal with the injustices that will come his way. Instead of becoming discouraged by his new realization, the narrator instead uses this knowledge as a tool to educate himself. After his realization, the narrator is able to talk more freely and openly with his mom regarding racial issues. At the beginning of the book, the narrator was very sheltered and wasn’t really even aware of his race. However, he no longer feels isolated and uneducated about what is really going on in the country so he feels more empowered to talk about personal subjects with her.
Music and the narrator’s vanity have been recurrent themes in our class discussions and were both addressed in our reading from The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man this past weekend. The narrator’s disconnection from society and real relationships has, in past readings, inclined me to think that his arrogance was a result of this and his ignorance of how friendly relationships function. This idea was shattered when the narrator acknowledged his self-importance on page 58, “This was gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself”. He expresses this after experiencing the thrill of gambling and once again being the center of attention. He is aware of his faults and claims to try to rid himself of this arrogance, but has made no apparent attempts in past readings.
Music was a major part of the narrators childhood and self identity before moving to the South and occupying his time with what he thought to be capital producing work. Music never appealed to him as a way of making serious money and subsequently his involvement or obsession with it began to subside. The club and the new ragtime music capture his attention and intrigue once again. His eyes are opened first hand to a different black social class made up of famous black musicians, composers, athletes and activists who are not only known in black society, but white as well.
"...Mother, am I white?" (11). Identity can be considered a major theme throughout the novel. There are multiple occurrences were the narrator tries to fit into different environments around him. In school he thought he was white, and at his first job he was Cuban. The narrator seems to not know who he is, he remains nameless in the novel. He seems like he just goes where ever life takes him. He doesn't have a planned out life and doesn't have any family to fall back on. The only think the narrator has in his music. "Often when playing i could not keep the tears which formed in my eyes from rolling down my cheeks." (17) Music seemed like the only thing the narrator really understood. He was able to have an identity, something he could relate to with other people. When he goes to New York music is still something he is able to enjoy, through the gambling and clubbing. "Then he began to play; and such playing! I stopped talking to listen." (60)
Chapter 9 introduces the first time our narrator has considered his race as an identifier. When he tells his millionaire that he wishes to go back to the South of the United States to play music, his narrator gives him a long lecture about his options. He can go play music, but forever be a struggling black man, or he can luxuriously travel with him and live forever white. He says, “My boy, you are by blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man. Now why do you want to throw your life away amidst the poverty and ignorance, in the hopeless struggle of the black people of the United States?” (86) Since this is the type of choice that it permanent, the millionaire does not hold back when telling his friend his opinion. Throughout their trip to Europe, the millionaire has been a mentor to our narrator and has brought him from the lower class to the very elite. He is clearly offended that our narrator is choosing a struggling lifestyle and throw away all he has gained. Since our narrator has a choice of which race to identify with, the millionaire finds it “foolish to unnecessarily take their wrongs on your shoulders” (87).
Our mysterious authors identity is never revealed to us. This is a rather annoying concept of the book as we find ourselves referring to "that guy" or "that girl." His identity is a mystery to even him as sometimes he associates himself with the black race and other times the white race. When he is on the boat back to the US talking to a highly educated black man he uses the word "we" when talking about "their" situation. He is an intriguing character when he is by himself, but once he is thrown into a group of people his identity seems to wash away. Its almost like peer/environment pressure. When he is in the city he is "forced" to gamble and party like a rockstar. WHen he is by himself or with another individual like the professor from DC he seems to be a more interesting character. HIs thoughts come out and he is amiable towards his companions. HIs attitude towards these wealthy people makes everyone believe that he can fit into this elite class of society. But he can also fit into the depts of society when his individuality vanishes and he is thrust into malevolent hobbies. He says in the beginning of the book that he is divulging a deep secret to the reader a secret that has haunted him for years. Maybe he refuses to say anyone else's names because he doesnt want to blurt their secrets too. By not revealing names he would not drag other people down in his secret telling. He would let them keep living their lives. Yet maybe a benign person in this book is worthy of a name. A person that might not be attached to this deep dark secret. But as of now, no one is worthy of a name, instead they are just lost people in a crowd. Some people get more description than others such as the minister in Jacksonville, his Dad, the millionaire and the doctor in DC. And others like his frineds in Jacksonville and NYC get absolutely no description. Maybe he feels like the only people worthy of description are ones of higher class and education.
"The cries and groans were choked off by the fire and smoke; but his eyes, bulging from their sockets, rolled from side to side, appealing in vain for help." When Johnson witnesses the most disturbing and unpleasant sight he has ever laid eyes on, his whole world changes. Seeing a man of his own race while at the same time seeing his own race inflicting pain upon somebody as such, Johnson is overcome with pain and confusion. "Some of the crowd yelled and cheered, others seemed appalled at what they had done, and there were those who turned away sickened at the sight. I was fixed to the spot where I stood powerless to take my eyes from what I did not see.” Johnson paints this scene to readers just as vividly as it appeared to himself, standing right there witnessing first hand. However, nothing can compare to the emotions that James Johnson felt while watching another human being, let alone another black man, be burned and writhe in pain and agony. The struggle to find identity also comes into play in the feelings that surround the lynching. throughout the novel johnson grapples to find where he belongs in society and which race to associate with and seeing an event such as this drives him into deeper confusion. without knowing who he truly is, johnson is constantly looking for answers and hints to discover where he fits in best. viewing the lynching is one of the most defining moments of his life because he will have the image of the black man squirming as he is burned for the rest of his life. if that doesn't influence him one way or another, i don't know what will... Brendan
In a grade grubbing fashion I started my reading tonight with an eye open to a possibly motivating line that could bring me one step closer to a “deep and profound” comment on the same level as one of Asia’s. Nearing the end of the pages I had allotted myself to read for the night, I began to skim and allowed my thoughts to wander to what I wished to write. In doing this I almost missed one of the most obvious and thought triggering scenes of the night: the lynching.
It was terrible, disgusting and frightening, but what shocked me most was the narrator’s reaction to the event. “I understood that it was not … that was driving me out of the Negro race. I knew that it was shame, unbearable shame. Shame at being identified with a people that could with impunity be treated worse than animals” (113). The narrator does identify briefly his shame for such a “great” country that also has people burning other people alive, but more prominently he sites his shame for being identified with the race that was being burned. While reading my first reaction was to scream and say “No! How are you ashamed?! I am ashamed to be associated with a such a group of people that could do such a thing to another human being!”
These initial feelings are still with me as is a, for lack of a better word, sense of sadness for the narrator that he feels he must now hide or not openly advertise a part of who he is. This is the first direct and most gruesome form of racism that he has encountered thus far and his world is turned upside down – as is mine in a sense. I never thought of this as being a reaction to such an event, but I guess its possible for one to have these thoughts.
Hopefully I made some sense … I tend to ramble… haha
A great post, one that shows just what's possible when we allow ourselves to dream a bit, to let these words work their magic. (Yes, in this age of scientific enlightenment, I still believe in magic. I'm no muggle -- just a Mets fan.) But, that's not the point. For our next conversation, I think we should really explore his reaction to the lynching, as well as the life-altering decision he decides to make. Is our narrator justified in his actions? After all, can we really find fault with him for longing to survive? How might we connect his decision with others who hid parts of their identity for survival?
One other thread I'm noticing in these posts is the people the narrator meets along the way. We might consider who has the most powerful influence on him. Is it Red? Shiny? The people of the cigar factory? the people of the Club? His millionaire? One of my favorite characters is the doctor aboard the cruise ship. He has a rather curious line that we ought to consider.... "Do you know, I don't object to anyone having prejudices so long as those prejudices don't interfere with my personal liberty" (89).
ok.....something else to consider.... how does the narrator's early interest in gambling offer us insight into the life he decides to lead at the close of the novel?
In the last chapter of the novel, the narrator deals with a tough decision regarding love and his race. He stresses over whether or not to tell his lover, “a delicate beauty” (117) that he is of mixed race. The narrator feels himself torn over his love and a “strange longing for my mother’s people” (124), or devotion to his race. His fear that he could not have both tears him apart throughout their relationship, and finally confesses to her. After seeing her distress, the narrator feels ashamed and “cursed the drops of African blood in my veins.” (120). When he finally hears back from his love, the narrator is ecstatic to know that he can have both: his love for a white beauty and pride for his people. The two have children who represents them both, introducing the same issue the narrator deals with the whole novel: his racial identity. However, since the two are happily together, the children will be able to gain respect about their backgrounds from both sources, and probably will not be left feeling confused (as our narrator did without a father figure). His children remind him of why he chose to marry a white woman, and looks to them for when he regrets it. The book ends with the narrator announcing, “I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage,” (125) a cynical and pessimistic observation. This might make us wonder if the narrator is regretting introducing his children into the un-clear life that he himself lived.
When the author says, "I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage" (125), he indicates that he has concealed and disregarded his racial identity to obtain only a small number of benefits. He realizes this when he encounters Booker T. Washington who is changing the course of history through promoting the African American race. He says of Washington and his colleagues, "They are men who are making history of a race. I, too, might have taken part in a work so glorious" (125). Here we see the main character retreat to his usual selfishness. Once he observes success, he immediately wants to be a part of it, as previously seen in his endless quest to join the upper tiers of society. He expresses black pride only at the end of the story when he sees African Americans gaining rights and respect. Even as recent as the birth of his first child, he exhibits shame in regards to his identity. He describes his girl child as having, "hair and eyes dark like mine" (124). He then goes on to praise his second child with more caucasian features. Embarrassed of his heritage, he declares, "there is nothing I would not suffer to keep the 'brand' from being placed upon them" (124). The author has no gradual development of pride for himself and his race. He only develops respect for African Americans after he sees the successful movement occurring around him. He solely desires to root for the "winning team." Only when he discovers the glory-ridden path that he had declined and sees the "gallant band of colored men who are publicly fighting the cause of their race" does he regret choosing to identify himself as white. Formerly finding "pride and satisfaction"(116) with his money, the author suddenly refers to himself as "an ordinarily successful white man who has made a little money"(125). The main character does not truly honor his race. Rather, he is looking for the way to earn the most glory. What he earlier referred to as, "a label of inferiority" (113), he suddenly refers to as, "gallant...colored men" (125). A zebra cannot change his stripes. The author remains a self-centered, egotistical individual and truly did sell his "birthright for a mess of pottage"-- or a lifetime of worthless accomplishments.
"I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage?" (125) has to do with the bible reference of jacob and esau. As the story goes Esau was given the birthright as the older son in the family, which includes the financial blessing and the blessings of his father which in Jewish custom gives the older son the advantage and blesses him with a prosperous life. Jacob, however, was the younger one and therefore does not get the blessing of the father and would have therefore had to live in the shadow of his brother and maybe even depended on his brother for his livilihood. So being blessed is key to position of the person. Esau, without proper regard or understanding for his blessing, sold his blessing to Jacob in exchange for a pot of soup when he was hungry proving his complete lack of faith and respect for his father and the customs of his people. He did not value the spiritual inheritance left to him by his father and passed from generation to generation. In the end Esau lucks out of becoming a leader in one of the tribes and his brother becomes leader of the tribe of Jacob in his stead. Esau also lost the right to having the promised seed "the messiah" come from his loins in exchange for a pot of soup. Instead Jesus came from the line of Jacob. For a pot of soup Esau turned his back to all the promises God put in place for him for a moment of pleasure and in turn was used as an example for the rest of time. "see to it... that there be no unmoral person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a bowl of soup." _Hebrews 12:16. In regards to the Ex-colored man, he is like Esau because he was born with the ability to blend into both worlds and be excepted by both the blacks and whites. He was talented both in learning and raw skill. He could have made a difference in the lives of people of color everywhere if he had not decided to give up part of his culture to make the lives of his children easier. Instead, of reaching out, using his talent and reaching his dreams he allowed himself to fade into the background and let others take the glory for him. Perhaps, if he continued to work on his music and go on to publish as a black composer, he would be a celebrated person of color today . But like Esau, he gave it all up for a moment of pleasure, Love and insecurities, which became his bowl of soup.
Simple awkwardnesses plague our lives each day, ascending from finding one's car keys, to an illness, yet has one ever thought of "race" as an inconvenience? On yet another traveling expedition to New York, our bi- racial narrator questions an African American man on his issues with segregation and racial boundaries. In which the man replies "I don't object to having prejudices, so as long as they don't interfere with personal liberty" pg 89. Our nations Constitution states that people of all races should have the right to personal liberties, and justices... but how can ones whose ethnicity transcends into countless bits of culture, pain, and tradition excel politically and socially with genetic blockades that are standing upright at birth. Throughout history the simple solution to this problem, Hopeful Conflict. An ideology for Mary Ann Shad Cary (19th century) the first African American woman to become editor of a black based newspaper, "The Provincial Freeman". Also for Michael Baisden (21st century), a radio- personality for Kiss FM, who dedicated his fame to the social/ medical/ political education of the African American community as well as the world. No doubt, this is the ideology that I will instill in my children in hopes that they will tower over those blockades into an independent nation, under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all"
The reason the narrator is so impressed by the city of Paris is because the culture and style of the city and the way people live there are totally different from those he has encountered before. He is fascinated with "change" and new things. He, like his benefactor, gets bored of repeating things or staying in one place for too long. Like his personal background, he is interested in diversity. He feels that he has a sort of edge over others because he can blend in easily with different races.
Paris is a city enriched with culture, art, and intellectuality. It is filled with delicious and elegant restaurants, as well as expensive and rare places to shop. The people who roam the streets of France and live in the apartments and houses around the city are usually found to be of the upper class. They enjoy the delicacies of life. THAT, in my opinion, is why our narrator falls in love with the city. He is so caught up in the "high life" that he himself wishes he was of the upper class. to be continued...
After reading the essay by Emily Bernard, I keep finding myself drawing connections between it and The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man. As the narrator’s opinions in The Autobiography, begin to form more substantially and his view of where he thinks he racially “belongs” changes, the “negro question”, as it is referred to in The Autobiography, becomes a constant topic of discussion – everywhere he turns.
Following his initial discovery of his race and background, the narrator begins his journey to become a successful member of the black community and society The millionaire is the first character to directly attack the narrators efforts to be a high ranking member of black society.“… You are by blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man… This idea you have of making a Negro out of yourself is nothing more than a sentiment…” (86). These notions do have a subtle, but not overwhelming consequence on the narrator’s thoughts. It is not until the lynching that he chooses to not directly associate himself with the black race.
Originally a staunch supporter of the black cause it seems as though he has been warn down and has fallen to his greater desires of comfort and ‘high’ society. The narrator’s assimilation into higher white society is, as he refers to it, an act. He still feels the same shame he experienced at the lynching and is afraid to admit his relationship with such a race that could be treated as “animals”. His insecurities are ever present to the end: he saddens at the thought of his past ambitions while hearing Booker T. Washington speak and – with connections to Emily Bernard’s piece and anecdote – is apprehensive of his relationship with his white wife. “I was in constant fear that she would discover in me some shortcoming which she would unconsciously attribute to my blood rather than to a failing of human nature” (124).
In many ways the narrator and his views have matured throughout the book (I noted a slightly less arrogant tone in his writings), but when it comes to his final stance on race and inequity I feel that he is still insecure and not sure about his position in the world.
By the end of The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, the paradox of our narrator's simultaneous vanity and insecurity becomes most evident. Throughout the book, he has revealed his egotism as well as even describing his, "sense of vanity of which [he has] never been able to rid [him]self" (58). He refers to his "beauty" (11) as well as his "skill" (45). Furthermore, perhaps the zenith of his narcissism is the decision to write an (hypothetical) autobiography. To write an entire book about oneself, even if the ending reveals self-doubt, does require an extent of self-absorption.
Yet upon the conclusion of our narrator's tale, despite the blatancy of his vanity, he indicates a lack of pride and confidence. His once boastful personality recedes to one in which he denies his racial identity to all degrees. Even upon seeing "Shiny," the man who had once brought to the main character "wild dreams of bringing glory and honor to the Negro race" (29), now instigated, "embarrassment and confusion" (120). Through denying his birthright, he proves his insecurities. He considers his African American blood "a label of inferiority" (113) and thus indicates his regard of his heritage, a part of himself, as inferior.
Our narrator ends the book on a note of humility, declaring that he, "sold [his] birthright for a mess of pottage" (125). Although the reader could interpret his tone as humbled, keep in mind that the entire book was written in retrospect. All those moments during which the main character describes himself as "astonish[ing] [his] audience" (17), etc., the author is writing them at the end of his life. Therefore, his outspoken vanity concerning his appearance, intellectuality, and musical talent, conceals a more private sentiment of insecurity concerning his race and shame.
Which Would You Choose? Out of gas, broke down, or stagnant, whatever you want to call it our narrator's explorations have winded down to New York. Where after another quick analyzation of his racial options opts to "let others identify him" pg 113. Why does our narrator always take the easy route? Do they satisfy his personal liberties? Have the racist Southerners who defend their evil vices stalled his better judgment? In my perspective this end was foreseen, throughout this novel with the narrator' sheltered childhood, arrogant sense of pride, and unwillingness to create and maintain sufficient physical relationships (the closest one being the millionaire- referred to as MY millionaire). Well narrator... here is my analyzation of you. "The Ex- Colored Man"- an egotistical simple- minded vulcher, leeching on to anyone and everyone for simplistic reasoning and wisdom to answer the "negro question", whose solution is ultimately spilled out at the last moment- as quick as his narcissistic relationships. Leaving readers with no sense of the narrator's true "dimensions of self"- cultural characteristics, mental archives of himself, or everlasting emotional ties. I would hope that James W. Johnson made a sequel to this book that goes directly into the mindsets of the narrator and the people he meets, so that a thicker substance will sustain itself within the readers as to whether choosing your race is a luxurious advantage or a great mistake.
Towards the middle of the book, the narrator runs into his sister and father in a theater. He describes how upon seeing them, “all the springs of affection in [his] heart…burst out in fresh and terrible torrents” (81). And yet, ironically, he makes no attempt to make his presence known. Too afraid of confrontation, too afraid to face a potentially overwhelming experience, he leaves the theater immediately. In fact, for the first and only time in the book, he states matter-of-factly that he “did not hear the music”(81) playing in the second act. Ironically, the one constant presence in his life, music, becomes silenced by his emotional response to seeing his family. He describes this as being “a real tragedy” (81). His inability to confront the situation is remarkably similar to his inability to confront the issue of his identity. He often hovers over the black race ephemerally, forming pedagogical arguments in an attempt to convince himself that he has not only observed the race but that he has lived it too. For example, he describes for three pages, how “colored people may be said to be roughly divided into three classes, not so much in respect to themselves as in respect to their relations with the whites” (48). The argument is one of someone who is unable to penetrate a surface. A race with all its facets cannot be broken down into three simple groups. His belief that this is so reveals that while he dabbles here in there into the lives of African Americans, he has yet to experience the realities. He is however, able to probe a little deeper when he attends a church service. Because of his deep connection to music, he finds emotional satisfaction in the ceremony, stating “any musical person who has never heard a Negro congregation under the spell of religious fervor sing these old songs, has missed on of the most thrilling emotions which the human heart may experience” (107). This is one of the only times the narrator can be described as having delved into the cultural aspect of African American culture. Here he is able to find a connection to the culture through a shared passion for music. However, not long after this experience, he views one of the true atrocities brought about by racial tensions, lynching. It is after this experience, that he, ironically, becomes ashamed not of the racist whites who performed the lynching, but instead of African Americans, saying, “a great wave of humiliation and shame swept over me. Shame that I belonged to a race that could be so dealt with” (109). His logic appears to be backwards. One would assume that observing something so horrendous would evoke a sense of sympathy and a fervent desire to fight for one’s culture. Instead, he makes his decision to identify with the white race. Here he sees first hand one of the true difficulties of being African American in this time period, and his response is to run away in embarrassment. The book is titled, The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, but I am unconvinced. To call him an “ex-colored man” would be to imply that he was once “colored”. Here and there he dabbles in the experiences of African Americans, but he approaches his experiences as if he is an analyst, trying to uncover an empirical method to understanding his own culture. He dips his toes in the water, but never fully submerges himself. In the end, his becomes absorbed in his own deep sense of regret. “I have chosen the lesser part”, he says. “I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage.” (123)
'His character has been established as a happy-go-lucky, laughing, shuffling, banjo-picking being, and the reading public has not yet been prevailed upon to take him seriously. His efforts to elevate himself socially are looked upon as a sort of absurd caricature of "white civilization"...the public is loath to give him up in his old character.'
This quote in chapter X on page 100 is describing the author's view of how the black race was seen during his time, and the ways in which they were treated; in a comical and degrading manner. He goes on to state that although blacks are stooped to such levels of degradation, they are given the opportunity to change the way they are viewed, and make a difference for their people. Perhaps he hopes that he can become "the future Negro novelist and poet" or at least represent in his music a novelist/poet who is changing the future for the black race, providing them with more hope to be taken seriously for he, as a person of mixed race, has been doing well in his life, becoming a part of an intelligent, upper class, and allowing white people to see him as such, without ever giving a hint to being mixed. The author's note about the black race trying to elevate their status as being seen as a caricature of white civilization really embellishes on the idea that blacks as a whole are an utter joke, never to be taken as intellectuals, even if they prove to be smart.
"I spent a good many evenings at the Grand Opera. The music there made me strangely reminiscent of my life in Connecticut, it was an atmosphere in which i caught a fresh breath of my boyhood days and early youth. Generally, in the morning after I had attended a performance, I would sit at the piano and for a couple of hours play the music which I used to play in my mother's little parlor." (80)
Throughout the novel, the narrator has continually comments on how music reminds him of his past. Johnson's love for music has been a persistent theme and provides for him an escape from his normal niche and into a state of reminiscence about the cherished moments of his life. Music allows him to revert back to his undisruptable, tranquil life which he lived as a boy with his mother. A life in which he sported a carefree, lackluster attitude, a life he truly loved. Musics influence on our main character has seemed to be the one aspect of his life that allows him to transcend the static ennui of his common life into a more desired area of tranquility and ease. This state allows our narrator to truly divulge his emotions in a positive and comprehensible way.
A major twist in this novel is when the narrator makes the decision to change his entire persona and live the life of a white person, “I finally made up my mind that I would neither disclaim the black race nor claim the white race; but that I would change my name, raise a mustache, and let the world take me for what it would; that it was not necessary for me to go about with a label of inferiority passed across my forehead” (113). Although the narrator says that he will be ambiguous, it seems as if he is taking these steps in order to remove himself from his black heritage. As he says, he was ashamed “at being identified with a people that could with impunity be treated worse than animals” (113). I think 2 major triggers of this decision were: the speech by the “millionaire” that proved some very logical points (a colored man in the United States must work harder to attain status than a white man and more often than not, does not receive the credibility he might deserve) and his witnessing of the brutal killing of another black person by southern whites. The narrator evidences how impartial he is toward his ethnicity. When we thought that the narrator had made the long haul through the black race, the Hispanic race, and finally the white race by easily fitting into the “millionaire’s” social group, he reverts back to his roots and decides to embrace his heritage. Upon being convinced that being black is a huge disadvantage in the world he lives in, he shows the reader how quickly he can disassociate himself with the black race, especially when social standing and success are involved. To the narrator, money is success and by the end of the novel after traveling the world and investigating different ethnicities, he determines that success means being white. The narrator is obviously willing to go to extremes to make money and find success considering that he gave up his passions of making history with his piano skills. The narrator allows unforeseen twists and turns to determine his life: upon losing all of his money he does not go back to college, after one game of craps he allows it to rule his life, he travels to Europe at the spur of the moment and upon seeing the killing of a black man he gives up creating new forms of piano using the influences old slave songs.
After “making it” in the world of white people, it is interesting to note how the narrator becomes so ashamed of his background that he almost loses the love of his life. We become aware of the newfound self-consciousness that encompasses the narrator when he is overcome with fear of telling his love his true ethnicity, “I am sure I would have found it easier to take the place of a gladiator, no matter how fierce the Numdian lion, than to tell that slender girl that I had Negro blood in my veins. The fact which I had at times wished to cry out, I now wished to hide forever” (119). This, in a way, shows the reader how self-absorbed the narrator is. Upon reaching the ranks of the upper social classes of the white people, he wanted to cry out that he was black, in order the prove that a black man is capable of success, but when something close to his heart is at stake, he becomes a coward and fears telling the truth. When he is not being threatened, the narrator acts bold because he wears a mask that hides his true self from outsiders, but when his relationship is on the line, it is as if the mask becomes transparent and the narrator’s persona becomes defensive and fearful. When the narrator says, “This was the only time in my life that I ever felt absolute regret at being colored…and wished I were really white” (121), it is hard to believe that the relationship between the narrator and the woman can be that sturdy. It is surprising that the narrator would think that the slightest change in ones background could rip apart the building blocks that had created this relationship. This is obviously a testament to the time period but also to the narrator’s self-consciousness that he would go so far as to hide his true self from everyone except his wife.
This guy is all about self-preservation. And in the grand scheme of things, that isn't called selfishness...it's survival. Although I don't agree with the narrators disregard and banishing of his true heritage, who are we to say that given the same circumstance, we wouldn't have done the same. A truly proud and brave man would've embraced the true nature of his heritage and used his resources and intelligence to improve the stature of the black race. But our narrator obviously didn't have the hero like qualities that we wished to have to seen.
As a result of the narrators ability to "pass" for white...his life is reduced to just that...a passing. Rather than being a trailblazer for the african american race, he is forced to live a lie to everyone except his wife. He idly carries on through life, occasionally wanting to scream out the truth, but never finds the courage too. The benefits of the safety and convenience of passing for white, come with the sacrifices of self-loathing and disappointment.
After the sudden murder of the “widow”, Chapter 9 begins with the Ex-Colored man traveling with his millionaire friend to Paris. They live there for a few months, shopping, site seeing, and having a good time. The Millionaire would host parties and have the protagonist play the piano. Music was, in my opinion, a strong reason why the millionaire brought the protagonist to Europe. After traveling to various European cities including London, Spain and Brussels, the main character tells his millionaire friend that he wants to return to the United States to pursue his music. “…look at the terrible handicap you are putting on yourself by going home and working as a Negro composer.” Page 86. According to the millionaire, going home would be a terrible decision. One thing that caught my eye in this quote was his use of “handicap”. From the millionaires’ perspective (a white mans view), being a Negro during this time allows for one to have a very limited lifestyle and capabilities in society. The main character uses his music to escape back to his younger years in Connecticut and his childhood there. He plays the ragtime music, which is new to the millionaires’ friends yet very classic in the protagonists view. Personally, I would have stayed in Europe, rather than returning home. One set back if would have stayed with the millionaire would be that he would not have found true love and started a family. He made the choice to return home and therefore gained music and a new and loving family.
New York City, the first vibe the narrator gets or presents to the reader is negative. "...her cruel feet; others she condemns to a fate like that of galley slaves a few she favors and fondles, riding them high on the bubbles of fortune then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall." (55) Unfortunately his feelings or thoughts about dear New York came true in a sense. The narrator has many ups and down with gambling as well as finding and keeping love. He is constantly at clubs and betting and winning as well as losing money. At a point he is able to have a part-time "job" playing music for a millionaire. He seems like he happy, able to "work" doing what he loves most, playing the piano, as well as go clubbing. Along with working the narrator thought of actually loving someone the "widow". But New York soon "blows the bubbles out and laughs..."(55) Every thing that the narrator expressed while entering New York seemed to have come true. He was brought opportunity but it didn't last. New York was thought to be the city that sort of defined America and the land of opportunity. For many people it was the first impression of America. It was a tough place to live, and it was hard to succeed if someone didn't have much money. The narrator has defiantly seen both sides of New York, the wealthy,and successful. As well as the poor, and struggling side.
I feel like the title; The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, does not fit the book. Yes, there are times were the narrator denies his identity as a black man, but there are times were he accepts it, especially at the end of the book. "My love for my children makes me glad that I am what I am, and keeps me from desiring to be otherwise..."(125). I feel like he finally found and accepted himself. Before that it seemed like he didn't even have a race. Even since he found out he wasn't white he didn't know who he was. He went through many changes. For the longest time, music seemed to be the only thing he could truly use to define himself. It is until he meets his future wife, the issue of his race and question and hiding it comes out. "i had assumed and played my role as a white man..." (118) His struggle for a true identity arises just like when he was child. A desire for the love of someone causes him to almost hide who he was "...I would have found it easier to take the place of gladiator, no matter how fierce the Numidian lion, than to tell that slender girl that i had negro blood in my veins. The fact which i had at times wished to cry out, I now wished to hide forever."(119). Although he wanted to hid himself he deeply wished to tell his lover the truth but it only caused him to hate himself more..."This was the only time in my life that i have felt absolute regret at being colored, that i cursed the drops of African blood in my veins, and wished that i were really white." (121) His struggle of accepting his true self and figuring out his identity ends in a positive. His finally accepts who he is. I think the title should take out the "ex" part. or maybe change it to be sometime like The autobiography of a confused colored man, because thats what the narrator was the entire book.
I'm gonna have to side with my boy Karamo. This guy is a straight hustler. I'd even go as far as to say that he is the poster child for Rick Ross' song "Hustlin". He follows the money, whether it means he has to blend in with whites, black, or cubans. He has a sort of spontaneous attitude that is driven by his propensity towards money and living a decent life. That said, he's got a little Jim Jones in him as well. Every so often, he's all about "Ballinnn". He throws down money to play craps, he smokes Cuban cigars, and even travels to Europe with his benefactor to enjoy the rich culture of Paris. He understands that with money, comes rewards.
Anyways, my point is, he does what it takes, and lives life the way it plays out for him. He lives life the way he plays the piano: he doesn't think much, he just does it. He's got somewhat of an eclectic personality because of the many diverse groups of people and places he's been surrounded by.
He doesn't feel he has to be a hero, as Kareem said, because he simply doesn't have the characteristics of one. That doesn't mean we should bash him for trying to meet the deadlines in life.
The phenomenon of racism to me still is truly unbelievable. from ages 118 through 121, james struggles with the decision of whether or not to tell the girl he loves of his true ethnicity, the fact that he has black heritage. To me, it is absurd that the mere color of his skin should have any impact whatsoever on how anyone, let alone a lover, will view him. Having been in love for some time, his race should have no influence at all on how she feels about him. Sadly, however, this is not the case, especially at the time this autobiography was written.
"Then I told her, in what words I do not know, the truth. i fet her hand grow cold, an when i looked up she was gazing a me with a wild, fied stare as though i was some object she had never seen. UNder the strange light in her eyes I felt that I was growing black and thick-featured and crimp-haired. She appeared to ave comprehended what I said. Her lips trembled and she attempted to say something to me; but the words stuck in her throat. Then dropping her head on the piano she began to weep with great sobs that shook her frail body." (121)
To me, this scene outlines the true absurdity existing in this world. The corruptness of the human condition becomes visible when James finally tells his lover about his true race. Sadly, she rejects him solely due to his heritage, his skin color. As absurd as this appears, it does in fact exist. Racism at the time of publication ran wild throughout the United States and, exemplified in this novel, even altered true-love relationships. Johnson goes on to say "this was the first time I ever regretted being colored." (122) This depressing revelation gives insight into the discrepancies existing as a result of racism, especially during that time period. Ultimately, the two did marry, however, the existence of the scene proves that despite his physical appearance, the fact that he had black heritage caused a negative reaction and this racism often occurred during the time of the this books publication.
The main character in this book is neither evil, selfish, or self absorbed. He's just another man in this world trying to find a way to survive. His nomadic and at times puzzling lifestyle is his way of sheltering himself from being emotionally hurt again like when his mother died. That was a turning point in the ex colored man's life. He finally realized that he was on his own in this world and if he wanted to survive, he'd have to find his own way. Moving from city to city is his way of sheltering himself from any further harm. The more focused he is on work and surviving, the less he has to worry about human relationships thus making his life easier.
Im gonna have to say that the life of our narrator is more representative of the song When I Grow Up...the remix of course. The guy wants cake, a house, and some safety.
I agree with Will when he says the narrator of this story is neither selfish nor self absorbed. He is so used to his entire life situation changing at a moment's notice that he has to have a confident attitude in order to keep on persevering. It is not as if the narrator is running away every time something is going his way in life; he knows he wants to be happy. He is just gaining the knowledge of what it means for him to be happy through his different day-to-day experiences. For example, he feels as if he is all set when he is traveling throughout Paris and London with "his millionaire." He is living the life, saying jokingly how his only hardship during his whole stay in Europe was if his millionaire would wake him up early in the morning and ask him to play a piece for him (79). The narrator again changes his mind of how he wants to live his life during an experience while playing at one of his millionaire's parties in Europe. When a man tells the narrator to get up from the piano, and then plays the theme of his ragtime while also varying it and developing it with every known musical form, the narrator then has a realization. "The thought came across me like a flash.—It can be done, why can't I do it? From that moment my mind was made up. I clearly saw the way of carrying out the ambition I had formed when a boy (85). He then continues to lead his life in a different, but still positive direction, and soon breaks away from his millionaire friend whom he has gotten very close with during this time, in order to pursue his goals with his music.
I just have one question. Why do we have to focus so much on the main characters race? If we flipped the script and he was actually a dark skinned man with a 1/4 of German blood, would we be focusing so hard the fact that he wants to identify with being white? Everyone has to choose what and who they want to identify with. Who are we to judge whether or not he is right to choose to identify as a white man or a black man. Regardless of what we choose to identify with, your genetics are the key code in telling who you are. I might only identify as Jamaican but in reality I am 1/2 Puerto Rican and my great grandparents are German. The blood tells. It is a little like being a woman who identifies as a man. Your genes say that you are a woman but if you feel like you were meant to be a man who are we to argue with you and because of political correction we wont argue with that person. So if he chooses to identify as a white man or a black man good for him. It is his own personal decision and he is only 1/4 black.
Did character X make the right choice in asserting himself into the white side of society? By the end of the novel it is hard to tell whether his assimilation was righteous or practical at all. Part of him wants the best life for himself and his family, but another part of him (explained on the last page of the novel) wanted to do something more with his life, something beneficial to the African American race. The end of the novel seems to have a sort of somber, regretful tone, as if X were disappointed at his life choices. And there is some truth to this regret. X had the opportunity to become someone great, his complexion gave him the ability to adapt to both white and black worlds, and with his musical talent there was a point to be made about the abilities of the black race. He could have at least attempted to create black music and play with the inspirations of his heritage, but he instead chose to take the safer route and assimilate into the white community.
Why does Johnson leave all of the characters in the story nameless? I think it adds to the idea of the commonality of character X’s situation with all other African Americans of his time. He is supposed to represent the whole of the black population of the US, and thus there is no name that can be attributed to him or anyone else specifically. Part of it may be that as this is not truly an autobiography, he was forced to keep the characters nameless, but even so, this technique also gives the novel the ability to represent racism and inequality on the larger scale.
The narrator really needs to decide whether he wants to be identified as either a black man or a white man. Let's face it...society isn't going to be everyone's best friend. You are going to be percieved as either white or black, not both. If he were to identify himself as a white man he would live a totally different life than if he were to identify himself as a black man. To be real...being a black person in the society that we live in doesn't really have any perks. People are going to think less of you and you will be treated differently. Being black almost stamps you as incapable. The millionaire's final appearance in the book makes a really good point when he said " My boy, you are my blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man. How why do you want to throw you life away amongst poverty and ignorance, in the hopeless struggle of black people in the United States? The look at the terrible handicap you are placing on yourself by going home and working as a Negro composer; you can never get the hearing for your work which it might deserve." (p.86) I think that even though what he is saying shouldn't be right...but its true.
"Do you know, I don't object to anyone having prejudices so long as those prejudices don't interfere with my personal liberty. Now, the man you are speaking of had a perfect right to change his seat if I in any way interfered with his appetite or his digestion. I would have no reason to complain if he removed to the farthest corner of the saloon, or even if he got off the ship; but when his prejudice attempts to move me one foot, one inch, out of the place where I am comfortably located, then i object." (89-90)
The black doctor that the narrator met on the train in chapter X was totally justified in saying this and i find that i am able to relate to what he is saying. People can and will have prejudice against others and nothing can change that...it is expected. But once they even attempt to seize upon you and move you from the place where you are...thats when it is just unacceptable and you just know that something must be done about it. They can feel free to move as far away from you as possible but how dare they even try to take you away from where you are.
“My old man died in a fine big house. My ma died in a shack. I wonder where I’m gonna die, Being neither white nor black?” - Langston Hughes
Just like the narrator of The Autobiography of an ex-colored Man, Langston Hughes seems to be struggling with his ethnic and racial identity. Being bi-racial seems to create a problem for both of these speakers as they try and find a way to define themselves in either category. I find it quite unfortunate that they are both so focused on labeling themselves and especially the narrator in James Weldon Johnson’s story, when they could be just embracing themselves for who they are, appreciating it and living life normally. Instead there is this constant struggle and confusion for the character in The Autobiography of an ex-colored Man. Even at the end of the book when he seems to understand and accept himself for he is when he says, “I am what I am” (125), he continues in the same paragraph and ends with a sense of regret with the choice he made to be “an ordinarily successful white man who has made a little money” (125). He claims to have “chosen the lesser part, that I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage” (125). It seems to me that while I can try and understand and appreciate his struggle with not being content with oneself and trying to identify himself, there is so much else he could focusing on, rather than dwelling on labels and definitions. There is no need to be so cut and dry or black and white, but find happiness in the “gray” area and whatever suits you.
In Chapter 9 of The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, the narrator’s identity once again is called into question. While staying in Berlin, the narrator plays a ragtime piece for the audience, and realizes a dream of his that he never before believed he could achieve. “My “millionaire” planned, in the midst of the discussion on music, to have me play the “new American music” and astonish everybody present. The result was that I was more astonished than anyone else…” (84). After a man “played it through first in straight chords; then varied and developed it through every known musical form”, the narrator “saw the way of carrying out the ambition I had formed when a boy”. After this, he began to lose interest in the trip he was on, starting to believe he was wasting his time and instead should be fostering his musical talents. At the same time, the bond that he felt had developed between him and the “millionaire” was one he was not sure he could break. While the narrator has occupied the millionaire’s “time”, something from which he was constantly trying to escape, the millionaire brought the narrator into a world of opportunity in Europe. The narrator comments that these people with whom he associated, “had made me a polished man of the world”. The narrator struggles to inform his friend he wants to leave. When he finally gathers the courage and finds the right time, the millionaire’s words force him to question his decision again. The millionaire tells him “you are by blood, by appearance, by education and by taste, a white man. Now why do you want to throw your life away amidst the poverty and ignorance, in the hopeless struggle of the black people of the United States?...” (86). Similar to the experience he had as a boy, the narrator deals with the issue of his race now as an adult. As a young boy, the narrator discovered the fact that he was colored, and slowly learned to integrate this fact into his life. Now, as an adult, the narrator has to decide whether to take a “white man’s” path, or try to make it on his own as a black composer. The millionaire recognizes the fact that working as a Negro simply places a “terrible handicap” on oneself. He believes that for the narrator to try and make a “Negro” out of himself would be like trying to “attempt to right the wrongs and ease the sufferings of the world in general”. To him, this is an impossible task. The issue of “selfishness” comes into play in accordance with the issue of race and the evident prejudice that existed in the United States during this time period. The millionaire’s more selfish outlook, to “make yourself as happy as possible, and try to make those happy whose lives come into touch with yours”, is a view that the narrator eventually deviates from. He decides to attempt to voice the concerns and dreams of the “American Negro” instead. The cover of this novel also demonstrates the narrator’s struggle with his identity. The picture on the front shows a blurred figure. The color of the body is predominantly white, but there are various slightly darker marks throughout the picture, displaying confusion. In the background behind the figure is a light purple shade, with a dark shade of black beneath it. These color differences are distinct from one another, yet also blurred together. This represents the narrator’s desire to be white, even though the reality that he is colored is present too. The figure does not have a face, or any specific details that would tell us anything about him. As readers, we are left to see the true identity that this character takes on.
The ex-colored man often does not know what to do about his race. He goes back and forth between being white and being black. It seems that he chooses what he wants to be at a given time. It becomes apparent that the man cannot make a decision on whether he wants to be one or the other and therefore is conflicted and somewhat corrupt. He does not show devotion towards one race and, at times, is ashamed of being black. It seems that he is black when he wants to make friends and relate to people and then he is white when he wants to appear upper class and superior. This is wrong because the man cannot accept being both and he does not have the courage to stick up for his race and help other blacks that are less fortunate. The man needs to realize he has a responsibility especially for being a black man to use his knowledge and power to stop the oppression he witnesses instead of simply saying he is ashamed. Until the man accepts his race and does some good for the African-American race, he will be faulted and he will not succeed in the ultimate goal of people seeing him for who he truly is.
This book shows that names are not necessary to define someone. The ex-colored man is depicted as a man who is lost in a battle of choosing what race he relates to and ultimately he cannot decide. But being nameless allows the man to identify himself with both races and he can comfortably live a life as both a black man and a white man. The man does not name any of his characters keeping the suspense of whom they are and are merely referred to as companions. James Weldon Johnson shows that names are just material and there is more to a person than what they are called. So, being nameless gives the characters something that can be respected because the reader is required to make judgments solely on how they are presented and not on what they are called.
I agree with kareem and how "when i grow up" represents the life of our main character but this is because of the loss of his mother. Without experiencing this hardship, the ex colored man wouldn't seem as ruthless or selfish. For the main character making money and living a nomadic lifestyle are ways of "garunteeing" safety. By him accumulating money he doesn't have to borrow from anywhere else and can suffice his own needs therefore making less connections with people. Same goes for his nomadic lifestyle, the less interaction he has with people, the safer he feels
"I was a more or less sophisticated non-religious man of the world, but the torrent of the preacher's words, moving with the rhythm and glowing with the eloquence of primitive poetry swept me along, and I, too, felt like joining in the shouts of "Amen! Hallelujah!" (p 105)
The influence of religion is, surprisingly, completely absent up until this point in the novel. Our nameless narrator never discusses his beliefs and never discusses those of others with whom he interacts. However, he spends a significant amount of time telling about the majesty of the black church, John Brown, and Singing Johnson's speeches and songs. Interestingly, he uses John Brown's real, full name...also never done up until this point. The narrator's description of the church is filled with reverence and awe, describing the call and response system used in the church, and questioning the origin of the black spirituals. More attention is payed to the spiritual writers themselves in "O Black and Unknown Bards" Especially reminiscent of the poem is the section in the novel: "And so many of these songs contain more than mere melody; there is sounded in them that elusive undertone, the note in music which is NOT HEARD WITH THE EARS. I sat often with the tears rolling down my cheeks and my heart melted within me" (107) I can't help but wonder...is the narrator actually interested in religion? The spirituals? Or is this just another thing he can use to shape his outward appearance?
I'm curious as to why J.W. Johnson had the narrator's wife die after only a few years of marriage. I see it as almost an act of revenge upon the narrator. By marrying her, he put himself in a constant state of torture, troubled by the color of his skin and unsure if she "would discover in me some shortcoming which she would unconsciously attribute to my blood rather than to a failing of human nature." (124). Speaking of his children, he expresses fascination with his son's looks, and seems to favor him. A sentence is given to the description of his dark-featured daughter, while almost a whole paragraph is focused on the boy. That the narrator thinks his wife "gave all" for the boy to have the pure white features that she, too, possessed, is a little tragic. The black in their children's blood is minimal, but certainly need not be disguised. The narrator has still not come to terms that black is just as good as white, and that color isn't what defines a man. I understand that it's not easy to say what he should have done, as I'm not in his position or time period, but I still feel strongly that his shame of his biracial background is completely unfounded. Race only shows on the outside, the inside is all the same. That there is nothing he "would not suffer to keep the 'brand' from being placed" on his children shows that he has barely evolved at all. He gave up his dream of writing a masterpiece about the life of black people in America, which was seemingly his life goal. I'm really disappointed with the way that our narrator changed throughout the book. He seemed to have such potential to be proud of his racial makeup.
GC…I think that your point about the book hating on women is interesting. While there is no doubting that the book does paint the women in a negative light…full of corruption, death, ect…it doesn’t hate because the women do have a positive mission/reason for their apparent corruption/madness. Their job is to teach. Through the women the narrator learns first hand of the harsh realities of the real world, in ways that books and traditional teaching methods would fail… he learns how to survive in that world and ultimately how to thrive in that world…He gains understanding from these women and what they bring to the table/represent…Every women in the book is at the center of a some sort of realization/understanding, or at some sort of major turning point. “Tell me mother, am I a nigger?” (11) The narrator’s first big realization…His mother’s sheltering ways/assumed stubbornness forced her son to take a good look at himself and re-formed opinions about himself and about how others view him…at the same this realization created a platform from which later decisions would be based from.
”Riding them high on the bubbles of fortune; then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall”…The witch is interesting…she allows for a little success but quickly takes away any success and forces basically everybody to become part of the lowlife-sludge that is NY…But not the narrator…he uses his combination of past experiences and skill to find a way out of the impossible …
And if the book really was simply hating on women, and not using the “rough/tough” women driven experiences as teaching aids then how could, The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, a fictional work, allow Uncle Tom’s Cabin a woman’s work, (Harriet Beecher Stowe) define the narrator?
I agree with Libby in that the introduction of religion and its importance into the book is a situation worth recognizing. it is one of the rare moments when the Man truly identifies himself with something that he is passionate about. when he uses John Brown's name, which is the first actual name that is used in the book, it seems to be out of respect. The man also mentions his appreciation for the black church, which indicates that although he at times tries to hide it, he is very much affiliated with black culture. in fact, i would go as far as to say that in absence of people that he can identify himself with, he turns to black culture to have something to look up to.
For the most part, I agree with Kris' idea that too much attention is paid to which race the narrator identifies himself with. He is in fact 1/4 black, and in today's society many people of that mixture identify as black, many as white, many both, and to many it does not even matter. Although I think too much time is spent analyzing this aspect of our narrator, I can see why a reader would: the question can arise at many different points in the book. For example in the beginning when he wants nothing to do with many of the blacks in his community, because he thinks they give the race a bad name, so he tries to branch away. Many are shocked when it is stated that the narrator could be passed off as white (i.e. when he is branching away from "his millionaire" to pursue his music), "My boy, you are by blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man..." (86). But the majority of his blood is in fact non-black. On the ship from Boston when talking to a man he meets he refers to blacks as "we" (90), while on the last page he says, "I am an ordinarily successful white man who has made a little money” (125). It could be argued that although we see different sides of the narrator throughout the story, he identifies himself with both white and black, for he does indeed have both types of blood in him.
Readers tend to fall in love with the main characters of books…They tend to root for the main character and hope for their success and/or personal growth…Even sometimes putting the main character on a different level than the rest of the society and overlook the character’s negative qualities/actions… conclusions are drawn that because of the reader’s bias are wrong/untrue/morphed… I fell victim to this…I desperately wanted the narrator to be somehow better than everybody else…to overcome the corruption the sludge the terrible environment of NY and the world…to be proud and change the face of his race…to make an impact on the world…but he didn’t…I morphed my interpretation/analyst of the narrator by convincing myself that he had experienced personal growth and was different…I used his short term success as the basis for my reasoning that he was different than everybody else and that he had grown and was not stuck in the ‘sludge’…Instead I should of remember what the witch said…
"...and all these become the victims of her caprice....riding high on the bubbles of fortune; then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall." (55)
What tripped me up was overanalyzing specific events and not looking at all his experiences as a whole…When stepping back you can see how our narrator hid…he was scared…he had the ability the tools the talents to be different…to rise above…to promote his family, his race and himself but chose not to…he feared the road would prove too difficult…he gives up at the end…doesn’t use the his hard learned lessons/experiences to help him prevail…his short term success is undeniable but ultimately his bubble was popped…and when he lands he worse than everybody else…and by choosing white he displayed to the world that he had given up on a himself, his family, and a race…all of whom would of benefited from what he could have been…
One passage that I found very interesting was in Chapter X, when the narrator explains the reason why men and "endowed" women tend to marry those who have lighter skin than themselves. He denies that it is a "tacit admission of colored people among themselves of their own inferiority judged by the color line." (92) Instead he believes it is mainly caused by opportunities, or lack thereof, for the darker African-Americans. The narrator is incredibly honest like this throughout the course of his discoveries. I find that in every culture, the people are trying to find a way to make themselves appear more "white." When I went to China last summer, all the convenience stores carried skin lightening lotions. The same could probably be said for India. I liked the narrator's explanation of the situation, because he insists that these people do not believe their color makes them inferior; instead, they simply realize the advantages that come along with appearing "whiter". Either way, however, these people would rather try to look more white than take on the task of proving that having dark skin does not make one inferior or less capable. sorry this is late!
"It cannot be so embarrassing for a colored man to be taken for white as for a white man to be taken for colored." (102)
The narrator expresses this sentiment after he states that this confusion led to his embarrassment. When people on the train realized that he was stopping at the house of a colored person, their attitude toward him changed (for the worse). Throughout the novel, he is not afraid to admit his shame for his race. Even later, when he watches the colored man being burned alive, he feels shame that he belongs to the same race as the man, rather than anger. At the same time, it is easy to say that he should just be proud of his race and not take advantage of his light complexion. The sad part is that everything he witnesses just shows him how difficult it is to live as a black man. Why would he want to deal with all of that pain, if he has the option not to? Why wouldn't he take advantage of his ability to pass as white? It just depends on whether he gains that confidence as he grows older to be whoever he wants to be, without worrying about the consequences. I helped Amanda with her first comment because I didn't have my computer that day .... sorry
79 comments:
In chapter VII on page 64 the narrator said "I often heard the younger and brighter men discussing the time they would compel the public to recognize that they could do something more than grin and cut pigeon wings." I think that the narrator himself isn't really trying to show the public that black men can do more than "grin and cut pigeon wings." With getting caught up in gambling and giving up cigar making for a living he has basically given into the stereotype that black men are lazy and can't commit to doing any one thing. The fact that he left college and passed on working hard and actually getting an education to move to New York to live his life gambling shows that he can't commit. Playing the piano is the only thing for himself at the moment that he can fall back on. At the end of chapter VIII the narrator accepts a man's invitation to travel to Europe with him an play the piano. This decision may not have been the best choice for the narrator to make. He really knows nothing about this man he has no clue how traveling to Europe will change his future. I personally think that this choice will end up hurting him in the long run and that he should have done the safe thing and stayed at Atlanta University, worked hard and continues his education. I think that his lack of commitment and spur of the moment actions foreshadows that Europe won't be a good experience for him
In this chapter, our narrator begins playing music for a wealthy acquaintance as entertainment to his guests. He begins to create a relationship with this aristocrat, and further than an employer relationship, they become friends. Interestingly enough, the ex-colored man never feels patronized or de-humanized, even though he is treated as mere entertainment. In fact, he is honored: “It was a pleasure to me to watch the expression of astonishment and delight that grew on the faces of everybody.” (72) The aristocrat, although he clearly thinks of him as talented, treats him almost as an object, by “loaning” (73) him to friends and resting while he played. Our narrator is actually very appreciative and honored; he refers to the aristocrat as “my good patron.” (73) This scenario truly shows the narrator’s good spirit, humility, and positive attitude, and when the guests stopped paying attention to him, he was not “disconcerted” (71). Similarly, later on in the chapter, the narrator gets used once again and comes to the conclusion that he was being used by the woman “to excite the jealousy of her companion and revenge herself upon him.” (74)
Music is a prominent recurring theme in the novel. Ever since he was a boy, the main character, who I'll call character X, has been influenced by varying musical styles in his younger years. It may not seem to affect him yet, but it does play some subliminal role in the shaping of his character and the character of the novel.
At the start of the novel he learns to play the piano and is influenced by the classical music that his mother plays. This marks the assimilated period of his life; he is still accepted into the white group in his school and conforms to the norms of the society. Classical music represents the traditional European values that once governed America. Before African American and other cultures emerged within the US, there was standard adherence to the ways of Western Europe. Their music was adopted as well as the social standards of slavery and class. This classical music that he plays sets the tone for the first few pages of the novel.
Character X then discovers his "flaw" on page 11. He is black and changes his entire demeanor because of it. However, once he moves to New York, he discovers the new and exciting genre of music called ragtime (61). It is with this new form that X unearths the rich potential and meaning that is inherent in the African American race. He begins to embrace this form of music and therefore also his culture. Ragtime music represents all of the diversity and greatness that black Americans possess, and the equality that they deserve. It is foreshadowing of the rest of the novel, and of the future of African American culture. Ragtime may have not been taken seriously at first in American culture, but some people could not hold back their preference for it. Johnson says, "These are lower forms of art, but they give evidence of a power that will some day be applied to the higher forms," (54).
Blacks deserve their equality and this is shown by the theme of music in An Ex-Colored Man. It is a deep and influential idea in the first chapters of the novel. It shapes the life of X as he is torn between the white and black races, and makes the novel a metaphor for the whole of American culture.
"...but the woman was so beautiful that my native gallantry and delicacy would not allow me to repulse here" (74).
This book hates on women. They are seen as beautiful, dangerous objects. His own mama just cleans and plays piano. The violin girl is the object of the narrator's desire. And the Widow is just that -- a Widow whose outlived her first husband and spends time weaving dangerous webs that ends in her own destruction. There's not one true woman in this novel.
Even the City in this novel becomes a product of the male fantasy: "She sits like a great witch at the gate of the country, showing her alluring white face, and hiding her crooked hands and feet under the folds of her wide garments,--constantly enticing thousands from far within, and tempting those who come from across the seas to go no farther" (55).
"Alluring white face" contrasting with "crooked hands and feet," elements of beauty juxtaposed against elements of disgust, repulsion. Yet our narrator continues to look on, for it's a beautiful and ugly world where he lives, and where we travel. After the death of the Widow, he writes, "but still I could see that beautiful white throat with the ugly wound. The jet of blood pulsing from it had placed an indelible red stain on my memory" (75).
Music has always proven to be a sanctuary. even for myself, i look forward to my band class every day that i have it because its a nice time to relax, do something you enjoy and make good sounds. for johnson, music is the same. playing the piano was something he could always turn to and it would always be there no matter what else was happening in his life. music is something that most people can relate to in some way or another and that is why it is such a universally loved thing. without music life would be incredibly different. there would be no music on the radio, just talk shows and other things that not as many people listen to. many cultures use music as more than just something to enjoy, it can be part of sacred rituals and other ceremonies. music is an incredible thing and for johnson, it is something he can always look to in times of trouble.
When it seems that the boy's life begins to be falling apart with gambling taking up his time and forces him to quit his job, he starts taking up ragtime music. He quickly learns how to play it and soon masters it. Again music plays a large role in the young man's life because it saves him from the trouble gambling was causing him and he can still turn his life around.
He quickly gains the respect of people at "The Club" and they see him as a great musician with an amazing amount of talent. He became so good that he, "developed into a remarkable player of ragtime; indeed, I had the name at the time of being the best ragtime player in New York" (Johnson 70). The young man took what he knew combined with what he learned to make a new type of ragtime that everyone loved. He saved his life while making new friends who appreciated him for who he was and what he could accomplish.
One particular friend went as far as inviting the young man to his home to personally listen to the new type of ragtime. The boy was paid well and was making an honest living that was well respected.
The young man is no longer the self-conscious boy who worried about his skin color; he is a man on his way to success leaving behind the troubles of his childhood. Music lets him get away from the problems of race and color and his friends and listeners only see him as a musician who has mastered an American genre of music.
The male mentality. Is it more manly to attack the other male in a situation where your female associate is unfaithful? Or, would it be right to go after the female with the thought that if you were in the other mans shoes, you would take advantage also? (male mentality) Although "he" could have been wrong, although "his" eyes could have deceived him, the "male mentality" would have taken over in any situation and gone with one of the solutions above. There is no possible way a "true man" could have been a "tweener" in this situation. For one, his reputation as a man could be tarnished even though he could have been wrong in the first place. In this situation, even the other man (X) had no doubt that he would be the one receiving the blow. "My feelings were far from being comfortable; I expected every moment to feel a blow on my head. She, too, was very nervous; she was trying hard to appear unconcerned, but could not succeed in hiding her real feelings." (page.74)
Now, since I cannot write anymore on that topic, and I don't have 250 words yet, I'm going to talk to you about how nasty the New York Giants are. A 41-13 victory yesterday pretty much convinced me that they will indeed win the Superbowl again.
Moving forward, chapters 6, 7 and 8 bring the protagonist to New York City. He is exposed to gambling, and all the negative things that go on in the city. Quitting his job as a cigar roller, the ex-colored man devotes his days to gambling, specifically craps. He also begins to hang out in the ”Club” where he plays the piano. He gets many piano plays gigs from a millionaire friend but still has time for gambling. One particular night at the “Club”, the main character sits with the “widow” and begins to drink champagne and talk with her. As he can see in her eyes, the “widows” escort is pacing behind him and the protagonist says, “I expected every moment to feel a blow on my head.” I would be thinking the same thing at this point since he is drinking with a woman who is “with” another man. On the contrary, her companion comes over to the table, pulls out a revolver and shoots her in the throat. The main character is shocked and flees the scene immediately. His instinctive decision to flee was probably, in this particular instance, the best choice to make. If he were to stay, then he runs the risk of being shot by the ”widow’s” former companion who, just moments earlier had shot her.
In Chapter 7 of The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, the narrator meets a rich woman who he terms the "widow", and her black companion. He describes her as "always dressed elegantly", and him too as faultlessly dressed, wearing clothes by one of the most exclusive tailors in New York. The narrator also learns that the "widow" paid for this man's clothes and diamonds. He further comments, "I shall never forget how hard it was for me to get over my feelings of surprise, perhaps more than surprise, at seeing her with her black companion; somehow I never actually enjoyed the sight." In the next chapter of the novel, this "widow" motions the narrator over to come and sit with her. He knows that this is a dangerous this to do, and says, "I went, knowing that I was committing worse than folly." As the scene progresses, the narrator senses that the situation is becoming worse. When the “widow’s” expression becomes frightened, he notices that her companion has entered the room with an “ugly look”. This man comes towards the “widow”, takes out a gun, and fires a shot into her throat.
In interpreting this scene and what happened in it, it is obvious that the reason for the black man’s anger was the behavior of the “widow”. What the most confusing and surprising thing was, was the black man’s decision to shoot the widow instead of the narrator, the man who she was flirting with. Male behavior would incline men to deal with other men, rather than the women. This is most likely due to the pride of men and their tendency to want to have their companions all to themselves. Here, this is clearly not the case.
Another interesting part of chapter 8 shows that the black man’s intentions could have been to also kill the narrator. On page 75, the narrator says, “There were other shots fired, but how many I do not know; for the first knowledge I had of my surroundings and actions was that I was rushing through the chop-suey restaurant into the street.” It is possible that after the black man killed the widow, he was trying to kill the narrator too.
The whole concept of the Chinese "Club" in Chapters 6 and 7 is central to the overall theme of the time period and the book. When the narrator arrives in New York City, he is amazed by the horror and awe with which it meets him. He describes "the dread power of the city" and now its inhabitants "cannot exist outside of it." I think that that is in many ways true of city-dwellers, in that everything outside of New York is blurry, quiet, and un-intriguing.
The Club represents the same sort of environment. Primarily, there is diversity at the Club that the narrator has never before seen. Chinese people run the place, black and white people from all "walks of life" enjoy the entertainment and festivities that are there, and there is a black pride in the autographed pictures on the wall.
In the Club is music, dancing, singing, laughter, play, and lots of drinking. When its patrons stumble out of its door in the early hours of the morning, the rest of the world seemed less exciting and real.
I think that the widow is one of the most interesting characters that have appeared so far in this fictional piece. She, like the rest of the characters, does not have a name. However, the narrator holds such a fascination with her that he describes her to great detail, more so than any of the other characters that have entered his life. Her semi-openness with which she conducts her inter-racial relationships is very uncommon for the time period and makes her a fascinating character.
Great comments Libby. I'm wondering how the City fosters a sense of openness that's perhaps unseen in other parts of American life (pre-Civil Rights). Might not be a bad idea for someone to investigate the Cotton Club in Harlem, one of the most famous clubs in all of the Harlem Renaissance.
At the end of chapter V i found it interesting that the main character chooses to go to New York instead of back to his own town or out west. New York is known to be a cultural melting pot and for someone that is so ignorant and mentally stuck in a box, i found this to be an rather paradoxical destination. In chapter VI he reaches New York and him and his companions decide to go to a pool hall. Here there are multiple forms of gambling including a game called craps. It's a simple game and the main character learns how to play easily. He then decides to bet 20 dollars and proceeds to win almost 200 dollars. I found this to be a turning point in the characters life. Earlier in the reading the main character is less accepting of his black culture and speaks badly upon it. Now he's embracing the loud and rambunctious behavior happening in the pool hall. He seems to be accepting his black culture more and more as the book goes on. "This was gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself and I felt that it was worth the money even if I lost" (pg.58). Along with associating himself with his black culture, he now also wants acceptance from the black race. This is another turning point in the main character's life.
"Then he began to play and such playing! I stopped talking to listen. It was music of a kind I had never heard before. It was music that demandedphysical response, patting of the feet, drumming of the fingers, or nodding of the head in time with the beat. The barbaric harmonies, the audacious resolutions often consisting of an abrupt jump... but in which the beat was never lost." (60) This quote is very representative of the growth of the main character. What stroke me the most was the fact that he described the harmonies as barbaric. As if, at first he believed that musicians could only truly be great musicians if they were trained and cultured. He regarded the music as brilliant, but not the same brilliance that he might have classified himself under but a kind of lower class brilliance although he really enjoyed the music. He even seemed surprised that the notes were never lost and and that the chromatics were so clean cut. His introduction to ragtime seemed to also open his mindset to the brilliance of the "colored man" and his ability to play music regardless of the person not knowing" music theory anymore than the theory of the universe." As he continued to learn more about ragtime and the musicians that played it, his respect for them grew with the thought that maybe if the musician at the club had been trained "he might have become at best a mediocre imitator of the great masters in what they have already done to a finish or one of the modern innovators who strive after originality by seeing how cleverly they can dodge about through the rules of harmony, and at the same time avoid melody. It is certain that he would not have been so delightful as he was in ragtime." (62) Lastly, besides the fact that through ragtime he was able to grow and develop professionally by mastering ragtime it also helped him to diminish some pride. Because, although he had always prided himself in having such a musical ear and wonderful training, he was not able to just jump on the piano and play without fault. He had to practice and watch and in the end his practice brought him to the next stage of his life, a private musician paid generously, a pimp and a traveler.
"These people live in a little world of their own; in fact, I concluded that if a colored man wanted to separate himself from his white neighbors he had but to acquire some money, education and culture, and to live in accordance" (49).
The narrator has a clear perception of races within society and their roles because of his background and his childhood experiences. Before and after his realization of his ethnicity as a bi-racial man are clear differences in his mannerisms and views. He has a clear perception of what a white man is supposed to be and do in society along with that of a black man. However, after coming to terms with his heritage, he has having trouble coming to terms with his "role" in society and becomes a bit lost and confused, which is evident in his constant transition between lifestyles and jobs. His trouble with finding and discovering his identity ends up making him seem detached.
Ever since his youth he has continued to move around from place to place and connecting with many different people, but only on the surface. He seems to have a fear of connecting with people or places beyond a certain limit, therefore keeps up his guard, just like with “red head”, the Mexicans in the cigar factory and black people.
His perception of stereotypes and society seems to hinder him from making and real sort of connection with anyone or anything that he views as possibly crossing lines and stereotypes.
In Chapter VI, the narrator arrives in the diverse and tumultuous town of New York City. After boarding up in his new "home", he and a few others from the boarding house go to a "Gentlemen's Club". Or is it really a gentlemen's club? While there are those in the club who sit calmly playing poker on the second floor, the first floor is filled with loud men full of excitement. Some are playing/overlooking a game of pool, unconsciously overusing the "n word". As the narrator travels to the second floor, he views two rooms with men who's actions oppose the others. In the first room, he witnesses men quietly playing poker, often using the word "gentleman". The narrator then walks to the last gambling room. In this room, he found a number of men gathered around a pool table yelling at each other and at the inanimate objects that were being used in the game (dice). After getting into the action of the game and participating in the betting, the narrator quickly learns to like the game "craps".
This section of Chapter VI brings out a few negative characteristics in the narrator. For instance, the narrator, in a sense, loses control of his actions after experiencing a night in both the gambling club and "The Club". He is unable to stop betting when he is playing in the game of craps because he is too immersed in the excitement. At "The Club" he is taken back by the new music he hears, ragtime, and completely falls in love with both the new style of music he hears, as well as the all around affect of "The Club", including the drinks, the dancing, and the variety of people who enter the club. As a result, it is evident that the narrator is easily effected by the environment around him. We are unable to truly get a grasp at who he really is inside, or the kind of individual he is.
I thought some major themes in these chapters were gambling and moving up in life. It seems as if the narrator is consumed with money and status. As we have already seen he has been able to in a way "bypass" the different races. As he is educated and his skin color can pass as being black or white, he is able to move through different groups including black people and Spanish people. He builds relationships and is able to conform to each environment he enters. When he first encountered the game of craps he was enthralled, "but here was something new (57)." Like the piano, like the black race, like the Spanish language, these new things he had been able in a way to conquer and this was something he could also exhaust. The narrator also shows another side of him, one that loves attention when he gets the reaction, "Who is he?...This was a gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself, and I felt that it was worth the money even if I lost" (58). It seems like the narrator's relative disconnectedness with the other groups of people gives him a sense of privilege, which he embraces. When he treated everyone in the room to drinks I felt as if he was trying to draw more attention to himself and make himself feel better than others around him. He says, “I learned to fake a knowledge for the benefit of those who were greener than I” (65) showing how chameleon-like he is trying to be. He is drawn to lavish things and upon learning of a relationship between a rich white woman and a black man, he becomes consumed, and seems to idolize their dynamic.
To Whom It May Concern:
Our extremely resilient protagonist, finds himself in a number of both difficult and unfamiliar situations. Whether it be the gargantuan effect of the untimely death of his mother, or the lesser significance of having his money stolen, he is only distracted momentarily and then continues to take setbacks in stride. His ability to "bounce right back up" seems to stem from his lack of connection to his peers after his mother dies. An example of this is the fact that throughout the story, we never find out the names of any of the characters. He is only concerned with how he can further advance his situation, and doesn't take the time to create lasting relationships. This can be seen in either a positive or negative way. Since he isn't held down by "trivial" things as emotion, friendship, and trust, he can pursue his dreams without deterrent. But on the other-hand, the following qualities aren't so unimportant when one is down and out, and he might eventually find himself a very lonely person.
Another component of his resilient nature are his amorphous qualities. Being bi-racial, and somewhat accepted by both races gives him an unmeasurable advantage. But his selfish nature doesn't allow him to act as a mediator between the two extremes.
Within the novel "The Autobiography of An Ex Colored Man" the critical narrator forces readers to question "what are the rules of harmony" mentioned in pg 62. Defined as a pleasing combination of musical chords", or "a pleasing effect produced by an arrangement of things parts or colors". In my perspective it seems as if the narrator is consistently searching & testing the boundaries of these rules of harmony. As he consistently migrates to different areas that bring new relationships, new pleasures, and ultimately new chords of music as to which the narrator assembles the bars- musical/ racial/ and stereotypical that plague his existential existence. Closed within a virtual box of self- arrogance & anti-socialism as a child, the bi- racial narrator, thrusts himself head first into a world in which physical connections are survival mechanisms for the future. The narrator's rules of harmony are thus simple- "Make temporary connections for myself without names, without social links, and without a family atmosphere". This greediness on the part of the narrator in my mind will not suffice as he continues to travel around the world into segregated, isolated, and even manipulated areas of inhabitation.
The main character of "The Autobiography of a Colored Man" is incapable of developing close relationships, which is perhaps the reason he has not expressed legitimate happiness throughout the book.
Initially, he befriends two children at his school, whom he refers to as "Red" and "Shiny." Besides his mother, these are the only two semi-close relationships Johnson develops. Yet after Johnson graduates, mention of Red and Shiny ceases, suggesting that their friendship was never very strong. Even after his mother dies, Johnson describes his emotions in one sentence as, "a feeling of unutterable loneliness" (31). There has yet to be another reference to his mother, thus far in the reading.
Otherwise, names are non-existent in this novel. He refers to other acquaintances as "the colored man," (42) or "my new found friend" (37). Yet his relationships are not signficant enough to require names.
Johnson is an extremely selfish individual. He is too involved with himself and his "tragedies" to concern himself with others. After his mother's death, he does not mention himself crying out of grief. He does refer to "emotions swell[ing] in [his] heart" (32), however, because "several hundreds of people...were there solely on account of love or sympathy for [him]" (32). Therefore, Johnson finds the presence of his friends more touching than the actual death of his mother.
His lack of attachments extends beyond people to places as well. He does not consider any location home, as he leaves cities without hesitation. He is without connection to both people and places and as a result, has not expressed happiness throughout the story. The closest he comes to contentment is when he refers to his duet with an attractive girl as a "positive dislike." He has a crush on his duet partner, but "constantly force[s] [his] accelerandos and rubatos upon the soloist" (18), revealing once again his egotism. The title of the book, “An Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man,” suggests that he does not even feel loyalty to his race, as he refers to himself as an “ex-colored man.”
The narrator says on page 58, "I could feel that I had gained the attention and respect of everybody in the room, every eye was fixed on me, and the widespread question, "Who is he?" went around. This was gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself, and I felt that it was worth the money even if I lost." This is a bittersweet statement made by the narrator. It is negative in the sense that for him, as a colored man, to get any sort of recognition by the people who surround him, he has to do something very exciting and stand out over everyone; in this case winning multiple times in a row while gambling. But, the narrator also feels as if this recognition is worthwhile however it may come. It was such a positive feeling for him to receive this recognition that this experience would still be worth it to him even if he lost all the money he had won from previous rolls. Later on he talks about this "Club" that he went to and closely observes the different types of people he sees spread throughout it. For example, he talks about this group of white variety performers he sees, and notes that he feels as if they come to the club to see Negro entertainers firsthand so they can "improve" the imitations they portray of them in their acts.
"...men who had lost all the money and jewelry they possessed, frequently, in an effort to recoup their losses, would gamble away all their outer clothing and even their shoes..." (59)
Grown men choose to disgrace themselves in the name of gambling...why? For fun? For winning? For risk? It doesn't matter, but it displays the sad state of NY. NY gives a chance of great opportunity and great fortune...but for the citizens of NY they choose to waste that opportunity and end up creating a society that flourishes around gambling, "diamond rings, scarf-pins, ear-rings..."(60) And a society that turns new fresh faces who bring promise (the narrator) into the same old materialistic and self-degrading individuals...
I guess all do become victims to the alluring witch...
"...and all these become the victims of her caprice....riding high on the bubbles of fortune; then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall." (55)
After speaking about the events that took place the night James went to the club, James decides to go further into detail about the club. This night as a whole represents his love for New York City; the club represents a place where he can escape the racism he occasionally faces or witnesses during the day. His skill in gambling allows him to transcend the daily problems he faces. As the chapter progresses, we begin to notice James' consistent commentary on the characteristics of those around him. He appears insecure at times, often commenting on the overly affluent nature of the white people. James seems somewhat degrading, however, at the same time, envious of these people. That scene exhibits James' true personality, one marked by a desire for wealth and success.
Towards the end of chapter VI, James become enthralled in the piano playing of a man in the club. He has to be dragged away by his friends just to leave. Throughout the novel, music has played a large part in James' life. It has acted as an escape for him. He is able to transcend his daily life into a state of euphoria when under the influence of the music of a piano. James' pure love for this instrument opposes his seemingly shallow personality, and in turn, portrays his character as sensitive.
Throughout the first 8 chapters, it becomes more and more apparent that our narrator is struggling to find an identity that he can truly hold on to. when he first travels to Atlanta to attend Atlanta University after his mother dies, his first reaction is that he does not belong with the African American class in the south, but also recognizes that he is not fully White. "Most of these celebrities I had never heard of. This made me an object of pity among many of my new associates. I, however, soon learned to fake a knowledge for the benefit of those who were greener than I; and, finally, I became personally acquainted with the majority of the famous personages who came to the "Club"" p. 65. Our narrator is, in a way, a fly on the wall within the culture of rich white people. he is a gifted piano player, and this fact gains him some recognition, but he is widely left with a surreal identity. In this context the narrator is a chameleon, as he is always attempted to blend into whatever background that he comes across.
“...a book that gave me my first perspective of the life I was entering; that book was ‘Uncle Tom’s Cabin’” (26) … “…it opened my eyes as to who and what I was and what my country considered me; in fact it gave me my bearing” (27).
This quote is an important part of the narrator’s realization or solution to his identity crisis. At this point in the book he is beginning to realize what it means to be African American and also how others view him. The narrator realizes that his life growing up in Connecticut has been relatively sheltered compared to how African Americans in other parts of the country grow up. He begins to understand that while me may think that he was treated unfairly at school in Connecticut, other places treat African Americans much more harshly. The narrator begins to prepare himself for a different type of life in which he will be judged, criticized, and marginalized to a further extent. This awareness however gives him his “bearing”, meaning that his new outlook on life and demeanor in general will become much more steadfast and resolute. Because he knows what life is really like outside of the Northeast, he is better prepared to deal with the injustices that will come his way. Instead of becoming discouraged by his new realization, the narrator instead uses this knowledge as a tool to educate himself. After his realization, the narrator is able to talk more freely and openly with his mom regarding racial issues. At the beginning of the book, the narrator was very sheltered and wasn’t really even aware of his race. However, he no longer feels isolated and uneducated about what is really going on in the country so he feels more empowered to talk about personal subjects with her.
Music and the narrator’s vanity have been recurrent themes in our class discussions and were both addressed in our reading from The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man this past weekend. The narrator’s disconnection from society and real relationships has, in past readings, inclined me to think that his arrogance was a result of this and his ignorance of how friendly relationships function. This idea was shattered when the narrator acknowledged his self-importance on page 58, “This was gratifying to a certain sense of vanity of which I have never been able to rid myself”. He expresses this after experiencing the thrill of gambling and once again being the center of attention. He is aware of his faults and claims to try to rid himself of this arrogance, but has made no apparent attempts in past readings.
Music was a major part of the narrators childhood and self identity before moving to the South and occupying his time with what he thought to be capital producing work. Music never appealed to him as a way of making serious money and subsequently his involvement or obsession with it began to subside. The club and the new ragtime music capture his attention and intrigue once again. His eyes are opened first hand to a different black social class made up of famous black musicians, composers, athletes and activists who are not only known in black society, but white as well.
"...Mother, am I white?" (11). Identity can be considered a major theme throughout the novel. There are multiple occurrences were the narrator tries to fit into different environments around him. In school he thought he was white, and at his first job he was Cuban. The narrator seems to not know who he is, he remains nameless in the novel. He seems like he just goes where ever life takes him. He doesn't have a planned out life and doesn't have any family to fall back on. The only think the narrator has in his music. "Often when playing i could not keep the tears which formed in my eyes from rolling down my cheeks." (17) Music seemed like the only thing the narrator really understood. He was able to have an identity, something he could relate to with other people. When he goes to New York music is still something he is able to enjoy, through the gambling and clubbing. "Then he began to play; and such playing! I stopped talking to listen." (60)
Chapter 9 introduces the first time our narrator has considered his race as an identifier. When he tells his millionaire that he wishes to go back to the South of the United States to play music, his narrator gives him a long lecture about his options. He can go play music, but forever be a struggling black man, or he can luxuriously travel with him and live forever white. He says, “My boy, you are by blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man. Now why do you want to throw your life away amidst the poverty and ignorance, in the hopeless struggle of the black people of the United States?” (86) Since this is the type of choice that it permanent, the millionaire does not hold back when telling his friend his opinion. Throughout their trip to Europe, the millionaire has been a mentor to our narrator and has brought him from the lower class to the very elite. He is clearly offended that our narrator is choosing a struggling lifestyle and throw away all he has gained. Since our narrator has a choice of which race to identify with, the millionaire finds it “foolish to unnecessarily take their wrongs on your shoulders” (87).
Amanda
Our mysterious authors identity is never revealed to us. This is a rather annoying concept of the book as we find ourselves referring to "that guy" or "that girl." His identity is a mystery to even him as sometimes he associates himself with the black race and other times the white race. When he is on the boat back to the US talking to a highly educated black man he uses the word "we" when talking about "their" situation. He is an intriguing character when he is by himself, but once he is thrown into a group of people his identity seems to wash away. Its almost like peer/environment pressure. When he is in the city he is "forced" to gamble and party like a rockstar. WHen he is by himself or with another individual like the professor from DC he seems to be a more interesting character. HIs thoughts come out and he is amiable towards his companions. HIs attitude towards these wealthy people makes everyone believe that he can fit into this elite class of society. But he can also fit into the depts of society when his individuality vanishes and he is thrust into malevolent hobbies.
He says in the beginning of the book that he is divulging a deep secret to the reader a secret that has haunted him for years. Maybe he refuses to say anyone else's names because he doesnt want to blurt their secrets too. By not revealing names he would not drag other people down in his secret telling. He would let them keep living their lives. Yet maybe a benign person in this book is worthy of a name. A person that might not be attached to this deep dark secret. But as of now, no one is worthy of a name, instead they are just lost people in a crowd. Some people get more description than others such as the minister in Jacksonville, his Dad, the millionaire and the doctor in DC. And others like his frineds in Jacksonville and NYC get absolutely no description. Maybe he feels like the only people worthy of description are ones of higher class and education.
"The cries and groans were choked off by the fire and smoke; but his eyes, bulging from their sockets, rolled from side to side, appealing in vain for help." When Johnson witnesses the most disturbing and unpleasant sight he has ever laid eyes on, his whole world changes. Seeing a man of his own race while at the same time seeing his own race inflicting pain upon somebody as such, Johnson is overcome with pain and confusion. "Some of the crowd yelled and cheered, others seemed appalled at what they had done, and there were those who turned away sickened at the sight. I was fixed to the spot where I stood powerless to take my eyes from what I did not see.” Johnson paints this scene to readers just as vividly as it appeared to himself, standing right there witnessing first hand. However, nothing can compare to the emotions that James Johnson felt while watching another human being, let alone another black man, be burned and writhe in pain and agony.
The struggle to find identity also comes into play in the feelings that surround the lynching. throughout the novel johnson grapples to find where he belongs in society and which race to associate with and seeing an event such as this drives him into deeper confusion. without knowing who he truly is, johnson is constantly looking for answers and hints to discover where he fits in best. viewing the lynching is one of the most defining moments of his life because he will have the image of the black man squirming as he is burned for the rest of his life. if that doesn't influence him one way or another, i don't know what will... Brendan
In a grade grubbing fashion I started my reading tonight with an eye open to a possibly motivating line that could bring me one step closer to a “deep and profound” comment on the same level as one of Asia’s. Nearing the end of the pages I had allotted myself to read for the night, I began to skim and allowed my thoughts to wander to what I wished to write. In doing this I almost missed one of the most obvious and thought triggering scenes of the night: the lynching.
It was terrible, disgusting and frightening, but what shocked me most was the narrator’s reaction to the event. “I understood that it was not … that was driving me out of the Negro race. I knew that it was shame, unbearable shame. Shame at being identified with a people that could with impunity be treated worse than animals” (113). The narrator does identify briefly his shame for such a “great” country that also has people burning other people alive, but more prominently he sites his shame for being identified with the race that was being burned. While reading my first reaction was to scream and say “No! How are you ashamed?! I am ashamed to be associated with a such a group of people that could do such a thing to another human being!”
These initial feelings are still with me as is a, for lack of a better word, sense of sadness for the narrator that he feels he must now hide or not openly advertise a part of who he is. This is the first direct and most gruesome form of racism that he has encountered thus far and his world is turned upside down – as is mine in a sense. I never thought of this as being a reaction to such an event, but I guess its possible for one to have these thoughts.
Hopefully I made some sense … I tend to ramble… haha
Lindsay,
A great post, one that shows just what's possible when we allow ourselves to dream a bit, to let these words work their magic. (Yes, in this age of scientific enlightenment, I still believe in magic. I'm no muggle -- just a Mets fan.) But, that's not the point. For our next conversation, I think we should really explore his reaction to the lynching, as well as the life-altering decision he decides to make. Is our narrator justified in his actions? After all, can we really find fault with him for longing to survive? How might we connect his decision with others who hid parts of their identity for survival?
One other thread I'm noticing in these posts is the people the narrator meets along the way. We might consider who has the most powerful influence on him. Is it Red? Shiny? The people of the cigar factory? the people of the Club? His millionaire? One of my favorite characters is the doctor aboard the cruise ship. He has a rather curious line that we ought to consider.... "Do you know, I don't object to anyone having prejudices so long as those prejudices don't interfere with my personal liberty" (89).
ok.....something else to consider.... how does the narrator's early interest in gambling offer us insight into the life he decides to lead at the close of the novel?
In the last chapter of the novel, the narrator deals with a tough decision
regarding love and his race. He stresses over whether or not to tell his lover, “a delicate beauty” (117) that he is of mixed race. The narrator feels himself torn over his love and a “strange longing for my mother’s people” (124), or devotion to his race. His fear that he could not have both tears him apart throughout their relationship, and finally confesses to her. After seeing her distress, the narrator feels ashamed and “cursed the drops of African blood in my veins.” (120). When he finally hears back from his love, the narrator is ecstatic to know that he can have both: his love for a white beauty and pride for his people. The two have children who represents them both, introducing the same issue the narrator deals with the whole novel: his racial identity. However, since the two are happily together, the children will be able to gain respect about their backgrounds from both sources, and probably will not be left feeling confused (as our narrator did without a father figure). His children remind him of why he chose to marry a white woman, and looks to them for when he regrets it. The book ends with the narrator announcing, “I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage,” (125) a cynical and pessimistic observation. This might make us wonder if the narrator is regretting introducing his children into the un-clear life that he himself lived.
What does the narrator mean when he writes, "I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage?" (125). What's pottage, and is he right?
When the author says, "I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage" (125), he indicates that he has concealed and disregarded his racial identity to obtain only a small number of benefits. He realizes this when he encounters Booker T. Washington who is changing the course of history through promoting the African American race. He says of Washington and his colleagues, "They are men who are making history of a race. I, too, might have taken part in a work so glorious" (125). Here we see the main character retreat to his usual selfishness. Once he observes success, he immediately wants to be a part of it, as previously seen in his endless quest to join the upper tiers of society. He expresses black pride only at the end of the story when he sees African Americans gaining rights and respect.
Even as recent as the birth of his first child, he exhibits shame in regards to his identity. He describes his girl child as having, "hair and eyes dark like mine" (124). He then goes on to praise his second child with more caucasian features. Embarrassed of his heritage, he declares, "there is nothing I would not suffer to keep the 'brand' from being placed upon them" (124). The author has no gradual development of pride for himself and his race. He only develops respect for African Americans after he sees the successful movement occurring around him. He solely desires to root for the "winning team." Only when he discovers the glory-ridden path that he had declined and sees the "gallant band of colored men who are publicly fighting the cause of their race" does he regret choosing to identify himself as white. Formerly finding "pride and satisfaction"(116) with his money, the author suddenly refers to himself as "an ordinarily successful white man who has made a little money"(125). The main character does not truly honor his race. Rather, he is looking for the way to earn the most glory. What he earlier referred to as, "a label of inferiority" (113), he suddenly refers to as, "gallant...colored men" (125). A zebra cannot change his stripes. The author remains a self-centered, egotistical individual and truly did sell his "birthright for a mess of pottage"-- or a lifetime of worthless accomplishments.
"I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage?" (125) has to do with the bible reference of jacob and esau. As the story goes Esau was given the birthright as the older son in the family, which includes the financial blessing and the blessings of his father which in Jewish custom gives the older son the advantage and blesses him with a prosperous life. Jacob, however, was the younger one and therefore does not get the blessing of the father and would have therefore had to live in the shadow of his brother and maybe even depended on his brother for his livilihood. So being blessed is key to position of the person. Esau, without proper regard or understanding for his blessing, sold his blessing to Jacob in exchange for a pot of soup when he was hungry proving his complete lack of faith and respect for his father and the customs of his people. He did not value the spiritual inheritance left to him by his father and passed from generation to generation. In the end Esau lucks out of becoming a leader in one of the tribes and his brother becomes leader of the tribe of Jacob in his stead. Esau also lost the right to having the promised seed "the messiah" come from his loins in exchange for a pot of soup. Instead Jesus came from the line of Jacob. For a pot of soup Esau turned his back to all the promises God put in place for him for a moment of pleasure and in turn was used as an example for the rest of time. "see to it... that there be no unmoral person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a bowl of soup." _Hebrews 12:16.
In regards to the Ex-colored man, he is like Esau because he was born with the ability to blend into both worlds and be excepted by both the blacks and whites. He was talented both in learning and raw skill. He could have made a difference in the lives of people of color everywhere if he had not decided to give up part of his culture to make the lives of his children easier. Instead, of reaching out, using his talent and reaching his dreams he allowed himself to fade into the background and let others take the glory for him. Perhaps, if he continued to work on his music and go on to publish as a black composer, he would be a celebrated person of color today . But like Esau, he gave it all up for a moment of pleasure, Love and insecurities, which became his bowl of soup.
Simple awkwardnesses plague our lives each day, ascending from finding one's car keys, to an illness, yet has one ever thought of "race" as an inconvenience? On yet another traveling expedition to New York, our bi- racial narrator questions an African American man on his issues with segregation and racial boundaries. In which the man replies "I don't object to having prejudices, so as long as they don't interfere with personal liberty" pg 89. Our nations Constitution states that people of all races should have the right to personal liberties, and justices... but how can ones whose ethnicity transcends into countless bits of culture, pain, and tradition excel politically and socially with genetic blockades that are standing upright at birth. Throughout history the simple solution to this problem, Hopeful Conflict. An ideology for Mary Ann Shad Cary (19th century) the first African American woman to become editor of a black based newspaper, "The Provincial Freeman". Also for Michael Baisden (21st century), a radio- personality for Kiss FM, who dedicated his fame to the social/ medical/ political education of the African American community as well as the world. No doubt, this is the ideology that I will instill in my children in hopes that they will tower over those blockades into an independent nation, under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all"
The reason the narrator is so impressed by the city of Paris is because the culture and style of the city and the way people live there are totally different from those he has encountered before. He is fascinated with "change" and new things. He, like his benefactor, gets bored of repeating things or staying in one place for too long. Like his personal background, he is interested in diversity. He feels that he has a sort of edge over others because he can blend in easily with different races.
Paris is a city enriched with culture, art, and intellectuality. It is filled with delicious and elegant restaurants, as well as expensive and rare places to shop. The people who roam the streets of France and live in the apartments and houses around the city are usually found to be of the upper class. They enjoy the delicacies of life. THAT, in my opinion, is why our narrator falls in love with the city. He is so caught up in the "high life" that he himself wishes he was of the upper class. to be continued...
After reading the essay by Emily Bernard, I keep finding myself drawing connections between it and The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man. As the narrator’s opinions in The Autobiography, begin to form more substantially and his view of where he thinks he racially “belongs” changes, the “negro question”, as it is referred to in The Autobiography, becomes a constant topic of discussion – everywhere he turns.
Following his initial discovery of his race and background, the narrator begins his journey to become a successful member of the black community and society The millionaire is the first character to directly attack the narrators efforts to be a high ranking member of black society.“… You are by blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man… This idea you have of making a Negro out of yourself is nothing more than a sentiment…” (86). These notions do have a subtle, but not overwhelming consequence on the narrator’s thoughts. It is not until the lynching that he chooses to not directly associate himself with the black race.
Originally a staunch supporter of the black cause it seems as though he has been warn down and has fallen to his greater desires of comfort and ‘high’ society. The narrator’s assimilation into higher white society is, as he refers to it, an act. He still feels the same shame he experienced at the lynching and is afraid to admit his relationship with such a race that could be treated as “animals”. His insecurities are ever present to the end: he saddens at the thought of his past ambitions while hearing Booker T. Washington speak and – with connections to Emily Bernard’s piece and anecdote – is apprehensive of his relationship with his white wife. “I was in constant fear that she would discover in me some shortcoming which she would unconsciously attribute to my blood rather than to a failing of human nature” (124).
In many ways the narrator and his views have matured throughout the book (I noted a slightly less arrogant tone in his writings), but when it comes to his final stance on race and inequity I feel that he is still insecure and not sure about his position in the world.
By the end of The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, the paradox of our narrator's simultaneous vanity and insecurity becomes most evident. Throughout the book, he has revealed his egotism as well as even describing his, "sense of vanity of which [he has] never been able to rid [him]self" (58). He refers to his "beauty" (11) as well as his "skill" (45). Furthermore, perhaps the zenith of his narcissism is the decision to write an (hypothetical) autobiography. To write an entire book about oneself, even if the ending reveals self-doubt, does require an extent of self-absorption.
Yet upon the conclusion of our narrator's tale, despite the blatancy of his vanity, he indicates a lack of pride and confidence. His once boastful personality recedes to one in which he denies his racial identity to all degrees. Even upon seeing "Shiny," the man who had once brought to the main character "wild dreams of bringing glory and honor to the Negro race" (29), now instigated, "embarrassment and confusion" (120). Through denying his birthright, he proves his insecurities. He considers his African American blood "a label of inferiority" (113) and thus indicates his regard of his heritage, a part of himself, as inferior.
Our narrator ends the book on a note of humility, declaring that he, "sold [his] birthright for a mess of pottage" (125). Although the reader could interpret his tone as humbled, keep in mind that the entire book was written in retrospect. All those moments during which the main character describes himself as "astonish[ing] [his] audience" (17), etc., the author is writing them at the end of his life. Therefore, his outspoken vanity concerning his appearance, intellectuality, and musical talent, conceals a more private sentiment of insecurity concerning his race and shame.
Which Would You Choose?
Out of gas, broke down, or stagnant, whatever you want to call it our narrator's explorations have winded down to New York. Where after another quick analyzation of his racial options opts to "let others identify him" pg 113. Why does our narrator always take the easy route? Do they satisfy his personal liberties? Have the racist Southerners who defend their evil vices stalled his better judgment? In my perspective this end was foreseen, throughout this novel with the narrator' sheltered childhood, arrogant sense of pride, and unwillingness to create and maintain sufficient physical relationships (the closest one being the millionaire- referred to as MY millionaire). Well narrator... here is my analyzation of you. "The Ex- Colored Man"- an egotistical simple- minded vulcher, leeching on to anyone and everyone for simplistic reasoning and wisdom to answer the "negro question", whose solution is ultimately spilled out at the last moment- as quick as his narcissistic relationships. Leaving readers with no sense of the narrator's true "dimensions of self"- cultural characteristics, mental archives of himself, or everlasting emotional ties. I would hope that James W. Johnson made a sequel to this book that goes directly into the mindsets of the narrator and the people he meets, so that a thicker substance will sustain itself within the readers as to whether choosing your race is a luxurious advantage or a great mistake.
Towards the middle of the book, the narrator runs into his sister and father in a theater. He describes how upon seeing them, “all the springs of affection in [his] heart…burst out in fresh and terrible torrents” (81). And yet, ironically, he makes no attempt to make his presence known. Too afraid of confrontation, too afraid to face a potentially overwhelming experience, he leaves the theater immediately. In fact, for the first and only time in the book, he states matter-of-factly that he “did not hear the music”(81) playing in the second act. Ironically, the one constant presence in his life, music, becomes silenced by his emotional response to seeing his family. He describes this as being “a real tragedy” (81). His inability to confront the situation is remarkably similar to his inability to confront the issue of his identity. He often hovers over the black race ephemerally, forming pedagogical arguments in an attempt to convince himself that he has not only observed the race but that he has lived it too. For example, he describes for three pages, how “colored people may be said to be roughly divided into three classes, not so much in respect to themselves as in respect to their relations with the whites” (48). The argument is one of someone who is unable to penetrate a surface. A race with all its facets cannot be broken down into three simple groups. His belief that this is so reveals that while he dabbles here in there into the lives of African Americans, he has yet to experience the realities.
He is however, able to probe a little deeper when he attends a church service. Because of his deep connection to music, he finds emotional satisfaction in the ceremony, stating “any musical person who has never heard a Negro congregation under the spell of religious fervor sing these old songs, has missed on of the most thrilling emotions which the human heart may experience” (107). This is one of the only times the narrator can be described as having delved into the cultural aspect of African American culture. Here he is able to find a connection to the culture through a shared passion for music. However, not long after this experience, he views one of the true atrocities brought about by racial tensions, lynching. It is after this experience, that he, ironically, becomes ashamed not of the racist whites who performed the lynching, but instead of African Americans, saying, “a great wave of humiliation and shame swept over me. Shame that I belonged to a race that could be so dealt with” (109). His logic appears to be backwards. One would assume that observing something so horrendous would evoke a sense of sympathy and a fervent desire to fight for one’s culture. Instead, he makes his decision to identify with the white race. Here he sees first hand one of the true difficulties of being African American in this time period, and his response is to run away in embarrassment.
The book is titled, The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, but I am unconvinced. To call him an “ex-colored man” would be to imply that he was once “colored”. Here and there he dabbles in the experiences of African Americans, but he approaches his experiences as if he is an analyst, trying to uncover an empirical method to understanding his own culture. He dips his toes in the water, but never fully submerges himself. In the end, his becomes absorbed in his own deep sense of regret. “I have chosen the lesser part”, he says. “I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage.” (123)
'His character has been established as a happy-go-lucky, laughing, shuffling, banjo-picking being, and the reading public has not yet been prevailed upon to take him seriously. His efforts to elevate himself socially are looked upon as a sort of absurd caricature of "white civilization"...the public is loath to give him up in his old character.'
This quote in chapter X on page 100 is describing the author's view of how the black race was seen during his time, and the ways in which they were treated; in a comical and degrading manner. He goes on to state that although blacks are stooped to such levels of degradation, they are given the opportunity to change the way they are viewed, and make a difference for their people. Perhaps he hopes that he can become "the future Negro novelist and poet" or at least represent in his music a novelist/poet who is changing the future for the black race, providing them with more hope to be taken seriously for he, as a person of mixed race, has been doing well in his life, becoming a part of an intelligent, upper class, and allowing white people to see him as such, without ever giving a hint to being mixed.
The author's note about the black race trying to elevate their status as being seen as a caricature of white civilization really embellishes on the idea that blacks as a whole are an utter joke, never to be taken as intellectuals, even if they prove to be smart.
Throughout the entire book, james has yielded an obvious love for music.
"I spent a good many evenings at the Grand Opera. The music there made me strangely reminiscent of my life in Connecticut, it was an atmosphere in which i caught a fresh breath of my boyhood days and early youth. Generally, in the morning after I had attended a performance, I would sit at the piano and for a couple of hours play the music which I used to play in my mother's little parlor." (80)
Throughout the novel, the narrator has continually comments on how music reminds him of his past. Johnson's love for music has been a persistent theme and provides for him an escape from his normal niche and into a state of reminiscence about the cherished moments of his life. Music allows him to revert back to his undisruptable, tranquil life which he lived as a boy with his mother. A life in which he sported a carefree, lackluster attitude, a life he truly loved. Musics influence on our main character has seemed to be the one aspect of his life that allows him to transcend the static ennui of his common life into a more desired area of tranquility and ease. This state allows our narrator to truly divulge his emotions in a positive and comprehensible way.
A major twist in this novel is when the narrator makes the decision to change his entire persona and live the life of a white person, “I finally made up my mind that I would neither disclaim the black race nor claim the white race; but that I would change my name, raise a mustache, and let the world take me for what it would; that it was not necessary for me to go about with a label of inferiority passed across my forehead” (113). Although the narrator says that he will be ambiguous, it seems as if he is taking these steps in order to remove himself from his black heritage. As he says, he was ashamed “at being identified with a people that could with impunity be treated worse than animals” (113). I think 2 major triggers of this decision were: the speech by the “millionaire” that proved some very logical points (a colored man in the United States must work harder to attain status than a white man and more often than not, does not receive the credibility he might deserve) and his witnessing of the brutal killing of another black person by southern whites. The narrator evidences how impartial he is toward his ethnicity. When we thought that the narrator had made the long haul through the black race, the Hispanic race, and finally the white race by easily fitting into the “millionaire’s” social group, he reverts back to his roots and decides to embrace his heritage. Upon being convinced that being black is a huge disadvantage in the world he lives in, he shows the reader how quickly he can disassociate himself with the black race, especially when social standing and success are involved. To the narrator, money is success and by the end of the novel after traveling the world and investigating different ethnicities, he determines that success means being white. The narrator is obviously willing to go to extremes to make money and find success considering that he gave up his passions of making history with his piano skills. The narrator allows unforeseen twists and turns to determine his life: upon losing all of his money he does not go back to college, after one game of craps he allows it to rule his life, he travels to Europe at the spur of the moment and upon seeing the killing of a black man he gives up creating new forms of piano using the influences old slave songs.
After “making it” in the world of white people, it is interesting to note how the narrator becomes so ashamed of his background that he almost loses the love of his life. We become aware of the newfound self-consciousness that encompasses the narrator when he is overcome with fear of telling his love his true ethnicity, “I am sure I would have found it easier to take the place of a gladiator, no matter how fierce the Numdian lion, than to tell that slender girl that I had Negro blood in my veins. The fact which I had at times wished to cry out, I now wished to hide forever” (119). This, in a way, shows the reader how self-absorbed the narrator is. Upon reaching the ranks of the upper social classes of the white people, he wanted to cry out that he was black, in order the prove that a black man is capable of success, but when something close to his heart is at stake, he becomes a coward and fears telling the truth. When he is not being threatened, the narrator acts bold because he wears a mask that hides his true self from outsiders, but when his relationship is on the line, it is as if the mask becomes transparent and the narrator’s persona becomes defensive and fearful. When the narrator says, “This was the only time in my life that I ever felt absolute regret at being colored…and wished I were really white” (121), it is hard to believe that the relationship between the narrator and the woman can be that sturdy. It is surprising that the narrator would think that the slightest change in ones background could rip apart the building blocks that had created this relationship. This is obviously a testament to the time period but also to the narrator’s self-consciousness that he would go so far as to hide his true self from everyone except his wife.
This guy is all about self-preservation. And in the grand scheme of things, that isn't called selfishness...it's survival. Although I don't agree with the narrators disregard and banishing of his true heritage, who are we to say that given the same circumstance, we wouldn't have done the same. A truly proud and brave man would've embraced the true nature of his heritage and used his resources and intelligence to improve the stature of the black race. But our narrator obviously didn't have the hero like qualities that we wished to have to seen.
As a result of the narrators ability to "pass" for white...his life is reduced to just that...a passing. Rather than being a trailblazer for the african american race, he is forced to live a lie to everyone except his wife. He idly carries on through life, occasionally wanting to scream out the truth, but never finds the courage too. The benefits of the safety and convenience of passing for white, come with the sacrifices of self-loathing and disappointment.
After the sudden murder of the “widow”, Chapter 9 begins with the Ex-Colored man traveling with his millionaire friend to Paris. They live there for a few months, shopping, site seeing, and having a good time. The Millionaire would host parties and have the protagonist play the piano. Music was, in my opinion, a strong reason why the millionaire brought the protagonist to Europe. After traveling to various European cities including London, Spain and Brussels, the main character tells his millionaire friend that he wants to return to the United States to pursue his music. “…look at the terrible handicap you are putting on yourself by going home and working as a Negro composer.” Page 86. According to the millionaire, going home would be a terrible decision. One thing that caught my eye in this quote was his use of “handicap”. From the millionaires’ perspective (a white mans view), being a Negro during this time allows for one to have a very limited lifestyle and capabilities in society. The main character uses his music to escape back to his younger years in Connecticut and his childhood there. He plays the ragtime music, which is new to the millionaires’ friends yet very classic in the protagonists view. Personally, I would have stayed in Europe, rather than returning home. One set back if would have stayed with the millionaire would be that he would not have found true love and started a family. He made the choice to return home and therefore gained music and a new and loving family.
New York City, the first vibe the narrator gets or presents to the reader is negative. "...her cruel feet; others she condemns to a fate like that of galley slaves a few she favors and fondles, riding them high on the bubbles of fortune then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall." (55) Unfortunately his feelings or thoughts about dear New York came true in a sense.
The narrator has many ups and down with gambling as well as finding and keeping love. He is constantly at clubs and betting and winning as well as losing money. At a point he is able to have a part-time "job" playing music for a millionaire. He seems like he happy, able to "work" doing what he loves most, playing the piano, as well as go clubbing. Along with working the narrator thought of actually loving someone the "widow".
But New York soon "blows the bubbles out and laughs..."(55) Every thing that the narrator expressed while entering New York seemed to have come true. He was brought opportunity but it didn't last.
New York was thought to be the city that sort of defined America and the land of opportunity. For many people it was the first impression of America. It was a tough place to live, and it was hard to succeed if someone didn't have much money. The narrator has defiantly seen both sides of New York, the wealthy,and successful. As well as the poor, and struggling side.
I feel like the title; The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, does not fit the book. Yes, there are times were the narrator denies his identity as a black man, but there are times were he accepts it, especially at the end of the book. "My love for my children makes me glad that I am what I am, and keeps me from desiring to be otherwise..."(125). I feel like he finally found and accepted himself. Before that it seemed like he didn't even have a race. Even since he found out he wasn't white he didn't know who he was. He went through many changes.
For the longest time, music seemed to be the only thing he could truly use to define himself. It is until he meets his future wife, the issue of his race and question and hiding it comes out. "i had assumed and played my role as a white man..." (118) His struggle for a true identity arises just like when he was child. A desire for the love of someone causes him to almost hide who he was "...I would have found it easier to take the place of gladiator, no matter how fierce the Numidian lion, than to tell that slender girl that i had negro blood in my veins. The fact which i had at times wished to cry out, I now wished to hide forever."(119). Although he wanted to hid himself he deeply wished to tell his lover the truth but it only caused him to hate himself more..."This was the only time in my life that i have felt absolute regret at being colored, that i cursed the drops of African blood in my veins, and wished that i were really white." (121)
His struggle of accepting his true self and figuring out his identity ends in a positive. His finally accepts who he is. I think the title should take out the "ex" part. or maybe change it to be sometime like The autobiography of a confused colored man, because thats what the narrator was the entire book.
I'm gonna have to side with my boy Karamo. This guy is a straight hustler. I'd even go as far as to say that he is the poster child for Rick Ross' song "Hustlin". He follows the money, whether it means he has to blend in with whites, black, or cubans. He has a sort of spontaneous attitude that is driven by his propensity towards money and living a decent life. That said, he's got a little Jim Jones in him as well. Every so often, he's all about "Ballinnn". He throws down money to play craps, he smokes Cuban cigars, and even travels to Europe with his benefactor to enjoy the rich culture of Paris. He understands that with money, comes rewards.
Anyways, my point is, he does what it takes, and lives life the way it plays out for him. He lives life the way he plays the piano: he doesn't think much, he just does it. He's got somewhat of an eclectic personality because of the many diverse groups of people and places he's been surrounded by.
He doesn't feel he has to be a hero, as Kareem said, because he simply doesn't have the characteristics of one. That doesn't mean we should bash him for trying to meet the deadlines in life.
The phenomenon of racism to me still is truly unbelievable. from ages 118 through 121, james struggles with the decision of whether or not to tell the girl he loves of his true ethnicity, the fact that he has black heritage. To me, it is absurd that the mere color of his skin should have any impact whatsoever on how anyone, let alone a lover, will view him. Having been in love for some time, his race should have no influence at all on how she feels about him. Sadly, however, this is not the case, especially at the time this autobiography was written.
"Then I told her, in what words I do not know, the truth. i fet her hand grow cold, an when i looked up she was gazing a me with a wild, fied stare as though i was some object she had never seen. UNder the strange light in her eyes I felt that I was growing black and thick-featured and crimp-haired. She appeared to ave comprehended what I said. Her lips trembled and she attempted to say something to me; but the words stuck in her throat. Then dropping her head on the piano she began to weep with great sobs that shook her frail body." (121)
To me, this scene outlines the true absurdity existing in this world. The corruptness of the human condition becomes visible when James finally tells his lover about his true race. Sadly, she rejects him solely due to his heritage, his skin color. As absurd as this appears, it does in fact exist. Racism at the time of publication ran wild throughout the United States and, exemplified in this novel, even altered true-love relationships. Johnson goes on to say "this was the first time I ever regretted being colored." (122) This depressing revelation gives insight into the discrepancies existing as a result of racism, especially during that time period. Ultimately, the two did marry, however, the existence of the scene proves that despite his physical appearance, the fact that he had black heritage caused a negative reaction and this racism often occurred during the time of the this books publication.
The main character in this book is neither evil, selfish, or self absorbed. He's just another man in this world trying to find a way to survive. His nomadic and at times puzzling lifestyle is his way of sheltering himself from being emotionally hurt again like when his mother died. That was a turning point in the ex colored man's life. He finally realized that he was on his own in this world and if he wanted to survive, he'd have to find his own way. Moving from city to city is his way of sheltering himself from any further harm. The more focused he is on work and surviving, the less he has to worry about human relationships thus making his life easier.
Im gonna have to say that the life of our narrator is more representative of the song When I Grow Up...the remix of course. The guy wants cake, a house, and some safety.
I agree with Will when he says the narrator of this story is neither selfish nor self absorbed. He is so used to his entire life situation changing at a moment's notice that he has to have a confident attitude in order to keep on persevering. It is not as if the narrator is running away every time something is going his way in life; he knows he wants to be happy. He is just gaining the knowledge of what it means for him to be happy through his different day-to-day experiences. For example, he feels as if he is all set when he is traveling throughout Paris and London with "his millionaire." He is living the life, saying jokingly how his only hardship during his whole stay in Europe was if his millionaire would wake him up early in the morning and ask him to play a piece for him (79).
The narrator again changes his mind of how he wants to live his life during an experience while playing at one of his millionaire's parties in Europe. When a man tells the narrator to get up from the piano, and then plays the theme of his ragtime while also varying it and developing it with every known musical form, the narrator then has a realization. "The thought came across me like a flash.—It can be done, why can't I do it? From that moment my mind was made up. I clearly saw the way of carrying out the ambition I had formed when a boy (85). He then continues to lead his life in a different, but still positive direction, and soon breaks away from his millionaire friend whom he has gotten very close with during this time, in order to pursue his goals with his music.
I just have one question. Why do we have to focus so much on the main characters race? If we flipped the script and he was actually a dark skinned man with a 1/4 of German blood, would we be focusing so hard the fact that he wants to identify with being white? Everyone has to choose what and who they want to identify with. Who are we to judge whether or not he is right to choose to identify as a white man or a black man. Regardless of what we choose to identify with, your genetics are the key code in telling who you are. I might only identify as Jamaican but in reality I am 1/2 Puerto Rican and my great grandparents are German. The blood tells. It is a little like being a woman who identifies as a man. Your genes say that you are a woman but if you feel like you were meant to be a man who are we to argue with you and because of political correction we wont argue with that person. So if he chooses to identify as a white man or a black man good for him. It is his own personal decision and he is only 1/4 black.
Did character X make the right choice in asserting himself into the white side of society? By the end of the novel it is hard to tell whether his assimilation was righteous or practical at all. Part of him wants the best life for himself and his family, but another part of him (explained on the last page of the novel) wanted to do something more with his life, something beneficial to the African American race. The end of the novel seems to have a sort of somber, regretful tone, as if X were disappointed at his life choices. And there is some truth to this regret. X had the opportunity to become someone great, his complexion gave him the ability to adapt to both white and black worlds, and with his musical talent there was a point to be made about the abilities of the black race. He could have at least attempted to create black music and play with the inspirations of his heritage, but he instead chose to take the safer route and assimilate into the white community.
Why does Johnson leave all of the characters in the story nameless? I think it adds to the idea of the commonality of character X’s situation with all other African Americans of his time. He is supposed to represent the whole of the black population of the US, and thus there is no name that can be attributed to him or anyone else specifically. Part of it may be that as this is not truly an autobiography, he was forced to keep the characters nameless, but even so, this technique also gives the novel the ability to represent racism and inequality on the larger scale.
The narrator really needs to decide whether he wants to be identified as either a black man or a white man. Let's face it...society isn't going to be everyone's best friend. You are going to be percieved as either white or black, not both. If he were to identify himself as a white man he would live a totally different life than if he were to identify himself as a black man. To be real...being a black person in the society that we live in doesn't really have any perks. People are going to think less of you and you will be treated differently. Being black almost stamps you as incapable. The millionaire's final appearance in the book makes a really good point when he said " My boy, you are my blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man. How why do you want to throw you life away amongst poverty and ignorance, in the hopeless struggle of black people in the United States? The look at the terrible handicap you are placing on yourself by going home and working as a Negro composer; you can never get the hearing for your work which it might deserve." (p.86) I think that even though what he is saying shouldn't be right...but its true.
"Do you know, I don't object to anyone having prejudices so long as those prejudices don't interfere with my personal liberty. Now, the man you are speaking of had a perfect right to change his seat if I in any way interfered with his appetite or his digestion. I would have no reason to complain if he removed to the farthest corner of the saloon, or even if he got off the ship; but when his prejudice attempts to move me one foot, one inch, out of the place where I am comfortably located, then i object." (89-90)
The black doctor that the narrator met on the train in chapter X was totally justified in saying this and i find that i am able to relate to what he is saying. People can and will have prejudice against others and nothing can change that...it is expected. But once they even attempt to seize upon you and move you from the place where you are...thats when it is just unacceptable and you just know that something must be done about it. They can feel free to move as far away from you as possible but how dare they even try to take you away from where you are.
“My old man died in a fine big house.
My ma died in a shack.
I wonder where I’m gonna die,
Being neither white nor black?”
- Langston Hughes
Just like the narrator of The Autobiography of an ex-colored Man, Langston Hughes seems to be struggling with his ethnic and racial identity. Being bi-racial seems to create a problem for both of these speakers as they try and find a way to define themselves in either category. I find it quite unfortunate that they are both so focused on labeling themselves and especially the narrator in James Weldon Johnson’s story, when they could be just embracing themselves for who they are, appreciating it and living life normally. Instead there is this constant struggle and confusion for the character in The Autobiography of an ex-colored Man. Even at the end of the book when he seems to understand and accept himself for he is when he says, “I am what I am” (125), he continues in the same paragraph and ends with a sense of regret with the choice he made to be “an ordinarily successful white man who has made a little money” (125). He claims to have “chosen the lesser part, that I have sold my birthright for a mess of pottage” (125). It seems to me that while I can try and understand and appreciate his struggle with not being content with oneself and trying to identify himself, there is so much else he could focusing on, rather than dwelling on labels and definitions. There is no need to be so cut and dry or black and white, but find happiness in the “gray” area and whatever suits you.
In Chapter 9 of The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, the narrator’s identity once again is called into question. While staying in Berlin, the narrator plays a ragtime piece for the audience, and realizes a dream of his that he never before believed he could achieve. “My “millionaire” planned, in the midst of the discussion on music, to have me play the “new American music” and astonish everybody present. The result was that I was more astonished than anyone else…” (84). After a man “played it through first in straight chords; then varied and developed it through every known musical form”, the narrator “saw the way of carrying out the ambition I had formed when a boy”. After this, he began to lose interest in the trip he was on, starting to believe he was wasting his time and instead should be fostering his musical talents. At the same time, the bond that he felt had developed between him and the “millionaire” was one he was not sure he could break. While the narrator has occupied the millionaire’s “time”, something from which he was constantly trying to escape, the millionaire brought the narrator into a world of opportunity in Europe. The narrator comments that these people with whom he associated, “had made me a polished man of the world”. The narrator struggles to inform his friend he wants to leave. When he finally gathers the courage and finds the right time, the millionaire’s words force him to question his decision again. The millionaire tells him “you are by blood, by appearance, by education and by taste, a white man. Now why do you want to throw your life away amidst the poverty and ignorance, in the hopeless struggle of the black people of the United States?...” (86). Similar to the experience he had as a boy, the narrator deals with the issue of his race now as an adult. As a young boy, the narrator discovered the fact that he was colored, and slowly learned to integrate this fact into his life. Now, as an adult, the narrator has to decide whether to take a “white man’s” path, or try to make it on his own as a black composer. The millionaire recognizes the fact that working as a Negro simply places a “terrible handicap” on oneself. He believes that for the narrator to try and make a “Negro” out of himself would be like trying to “attempt to right the wrongs and ease the sufferings of the world in general”. To him, this is an impossible task. The issue of “selfishness” comes into play in accordance with the issue of race and the evident prejudice that existed in the United States during this time period. The millionaire’s more selfish outlook, to “make yourself as happy as possible, and try to make those happy whose lives come into touch with yours”, is a view that the narrator eventually deviates from. He decides to attempt to voice the concerns and dreams of the “American Negro” instead.
The cover of this novel also demonstrates the narrator’s struggle with his identity. The picture on the front shows a blurred figure. The color of the body is predominantly white, but there are various slightly darker marks throughout the picture, displaying confusion. In the background behind the figure is a light purple shade, with a dark shade of black beneath it. These color differences are distinct from one another, yet also blurred together. This represents the narrator’s desire to be white, even though the reality that he is colored is present too. The figure does not have a face, or any specific details that would tell us anything about him. As readers, we are left to see the true identity that this character takes on.
The ex-colored man often does not know what to do about his race. He goes back and forth between being white and being black. It seems that he chooses what he wants to be at a given time. It becomes apparent that the man cannot make a decision on whether he wants to be one or the other and therefore is conflicted and somewhat corrupt.
He does not show devotion towards one race and, at times, is ashamed of being black. It seems that he is black when he wants to make friends and relate to people and then he is white when he wants to appear upper class and superior. This is wrong because the man cannot accept being both and he does not have the courage to stick up for his race and help other blacks that are less fortunate. The man needs to realize he has a responsibility especially for being a black man to use his knowledge and power to stop the oppression he witnesses instead of simply saying he is ashamed. Until the man accepts his race and does some good for the African-American race, he will be faulted and he will not succeed in the ultimate goal of people seeing him for who he truly is.
This book shows that names are not necessary to define someone. The ex-colored man is depicted as a man who is lost in a battle of choosing what race he relates to and ultimately he cannot decide. But being nameless allows the man to identify himself with both races and he can comfortably live a life as both a black man and a white man. The man does not name any of his characters keeping the suspense of whom they are and are merely referred to as companions. James Weldon Johnson shows that names are just material and there is more to a person than what they are called. So, being nameless gives the characters something that can be respected because the reader is required to make judgments solely on how they are presented and not on what they are called.
I agree with kareem and how "when i grow up" represents the life of our main character but this is because of the loss of his mother. Without experiencing this hardship, the ex colored man wouldn't seem as ruthless or selfish. For the main character making money and living a nomadic lifestyle are ways of "garunteeing" safety. By him accumulating money he doesn't have to borrow from anywhere else and can suffice his own needs therefore making less connections with people. Same goes for his nomadic lifestyle, the less interaction he has with people, the safer he feels
"I was a more or less sophisticated non-religious man of the world, but the torrent of the preacher's words, moving with the rhythm and glowing with the eloquence of primitive poetry swept me along, and I, too, felt like joining in the shouts of "Amen! Hallelujah!" (p 105)
The influence of religion is, surprisingly, completely absent up until this point in the novel. Our nameless narrator never discusses his beliefs and never discusses those of others with whom he interacts. However, he spends a significant amount of time telling about the majesty of the black church, John Brown, and Singing Johnson's speeches and songs. Interestingly, he uses John Brown's real, full name...also never done up until this point. The narrator's description of the church is filled with reverence and awe, describing the call and response system used in the church, and questioning the origin of the black spirituals. More attention is payed to the spiritual writers themselves in "O Black and Unknown Bards" Especially reminiscent of the poem is the section in the novel:
"And so many of these songs contain more than mere melody; there is sounded in them that elusive undertone, the note in music which is NOT HEARD WITH THE EARS. I sat often with the tears rolling down my cheeks and my heart melted within me" (107)
I can't help but wonder...is the narrator actually interested in religion? The spirituals? Or is this just another thing he can use to shape his outward appearance?
yea bah
I'm curious as to why J.W. Johnson had the narrator's wife die after only a few years of marriage. I see it as almost an act of revenge upon the narrator. By marrying her, he put himself in a constant state of torture, troubled by the color of his skin and unsure if she "would discover in me some shortcoming which she would unconsciously attribute to my blood rather than to a failing of human nature." (124). Speaking of his children, he expresses fascination with his son's looks, and seems to favor him. A sentence is given to the description of his dark-featured daughter, while almost a whole paragraph is focused on the boy. That the narrator thinks his wife "gave all" for the boy to have the pure white features that she, too, possessed, is a little tragic. The black in their children's blood is minimal, but certainly need not be disguised. The narrator has still not come to terms that black is just as good as white, and that color isn't what defines a man. I understand that it's not easy to say what he should have done, as I'm not in his position or time period, but I still feel strongly that his shame of his biracial background is completely unfounded. Race only shows on the outside, the inside is all the same. That there is nothing he "would not suffer to keep the 'brand' from being placed" on his children shows that he has barely evolved at all. He gave up his dream of writing a masterpiece about the life of black people in America, which was seemingly his life goal. I'm really disappointed with the way that our narrator changed throughout the book. He seemed to have such potential to be proud of his racial makeup.
GC…I think that your point about the book hating on women is interesting. While there is no doubting that the book does paint the women in a negative light…full of corruption, death, ect…it doesn’t hate because the women do have a positive mission/reason for their apparent corruption/madness. Their job is to teach. Through the women the narrator learns first hand of the harsh realities of the real world, in ways that books and traditional teaching methods would fail… he learns how to survive in that world and ultimately how to thrive in that world…He gains understanding from these women and what they bring to the table/represent…Every women in the book is at the center of a some sort of realization/understanding, or at some sort of major turning point. “Tell me mother, am I a nigger?” (11) The narrator’s first big realization…His mother’s sheltering ways/assumed stubbornness forced her son to take a good look at himself and re-formed opinions about himself and about how others view him…at the same this realization created a platform from which later decisions would be based from.
”Riding them high on the bubbles of fortune; then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall”…The witch is interesting…she allows for a little success but quickly takes away any success and forces basically everybody to become part of the lowlife-sludge that is NY…But not the narrator…he uses his combination of past experiences and skill to find a way out of the impossible …
And if the book really was simply hating on women, and not using the “rough/tough” women driven experiences as teaching aids then how could, The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man, a fictional work, allow Uncle Tom’s Cabin a woman’s work, (Harriet Beecher Stowe) define the narrator?
I agree with Libby in that the introduction of religion and its importance into the book is a situation worth recognizing. it is one of the rare moments when the Man truly identifies himself with something that he is passionate about. when he uses John Brown's name, which is the first actual name that is used in the book, it seems to be out of respect. The man also mentions his appreciation for the black church, which indicates that although he at times tries to hide it, he is very much affiliated with black culture. in fact, i would go as far as to say that in absence of people that he can identify himself with, he turns to black culture to have something to look up to.
For the most part, I agree with Kris' idea that too much attention is paid to which race the narrator identifies himself with. He is in fact 1/4 black, and in today's society many people of that mixture identify as black, many as white, many both, and to many it does not even matter. Although I think too much time is spent analyzing this aspect of our narrator, I can see why a reader would: the question can arise at many different points in the book. For example in the beginning when he wants nothing to do with many of the blacks in his community, because he thinks they give the race a bad name, so he tries to branch away. Many are shocked when it is stated that the narrator could be passed off as white (i.e. when he is branching away from "his millionaire" to pursue his music), "My boy, you are by blood, by appearance, by education and by tastes, a white man..." (86). But the majority of his blood is in fact non-black. On the ship from Boston when talking to a man he meets he refers to blacks as "we" (90), while on the last page he says, "I am an ordinarily successful white man who has made a little money” (125). It could be argued that although we see different sides of the narrator throughout the story, he identifies himself with both white and black, for he does indeed have both types of blood in him.
Readers tend to fall in love with the main characters of books…They tend to root for the main character and hope for their success and/or personal growth…Even sometimes putting the main character on a different level than the rest of the society and overlook the character’s negative qualities/actions… conclusions are drawn that because of the reader’s bias are wrong/untrue/morphed… I fell victim to this…I desperately wanted the narrator to be somehow better than everybody else…to overcome the corruption the sludge the terrible environment of NY and the world…to be proud and change the face of his race…to make an impact on the world…but he didn’t…I morphed my interpretation/analyst of the narrator by convincing myself that he had experienced personal growth and was different…I used his short term success as the basis for my reasoning that he was different than everybody else and that he had grown and was not stuck in the ‘sludge’…Instead I should of remember what the witch said…
"...and all these become the victims of her caprice....riding high on the bubbles of fortune; then with a sudden breath she blows the bubbles out and laughs mockingly as she watches them fall." (55)
What tripped me up was overanalyzing specific events and not looking at all his experiences as a whole…When stepping back you can see how our narrator hid…he was scared…he had the ability the tools the talents to be different…to rise above…to promote his family, his race and himself but chose not to…he feared the road would prove too difficult…he gives up at the end…doesn’t use the his hard learned lessons/experiences to help him prevail…his short term success is undeniable but ultimately his bubble was popped…and when he lands he worse than everybody else…and by choosing white he displayed to the world that he had given up on a himself, his family, and a race…all of whom would of benefited from what he could have been…
One passage that I found very interesting was in Chapter X, when the narrator explains the reason why men and "endowed" women tend to marry those who have lighter skin than themselves. He denies that it is a "tacit admission of colored people among themselves of their own inferiority judged by the color line." (92) Instead he believes it is mainly caused by opportunities, or lack thereof, for the darker African-Americans. The narrator is incredibly honest like this throughout the course of his discoveries. I find that in every culture, the people are trying to find a way to make themselves appear more "white." When I went to China last summer, all the convenience stores carried skin lightening lotions. The same could probably be said for India. I liked the narrator's explanation of the situation, because he insists that these people do not believe their color makes them inferior; instead, they simply realize the advantages that come along with appearing "whiter". Either way, however, these people would rather try to look more white than take on the task of proving that having dark skin does not make one inferior or less capable.
sorry this is late!
"It cannot be so embarrassing for a colored man to be taken for white as for a white man to be taken for colored." (102)
The narrator expresses this sentiment after he states that this confusion led to his embarrassment. When people on the train realized that he was stopping at the house of a colored person, their attitude toward him changed (for the worse). Throughout the novel, he is not afraid to admit his shame for his race. Even later, when he watches the colored man being burned alive, he feels shame that he belongs to the same race as the man, rather than anger. At the same time, it is easy to say that he should just be proud of his race and not take advantage of his light complexion. The sad part is that everything he witnesses just shows him how difficult it is to live as a black man. Why would he want to deal with all of that pain, if he has the option not to? Why wouldn't he take advantage of his ability to pass as white? It just depends on whether he gains that confidence as he grows older to be whoever he wants to be, without worrying about the consequences.
I helped Amanda with her first comment because I didn't have my computer that day .... sorry
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